brittle light
brittle light
Dec 08, 2010

Drifting

.
in a drift
I notice, but forget
long term memory disengaged

I bet some nice poems
are still a'float in there
somewhere

alone

never even bumping into each other

what happened?
they might ask
he couldn't find a pencil?

the cream of the crop
made of our own volition
out of whole cloth
the best he has to offer

but, because he can't remember
"save to long term memory mode"
we are all lost,
never to land on a page
or in a song

left adrift in this boundless sea of
everything else ever forgotten
...and that's a whole, whole lot!

you'd think he would have learned
by now

how the hell did this poem make it .....

About This Poem

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: upstate New York USA, USA

More from this author

Comments

brittle light

took your advise....It's bigger now!...hopefully, more satisfying.
so glad you spoke up, It's good having a second set of ears, eyes, minds....
thanks for keeping me on my toes,. I can get a little hasty with the submit button!

later,

S

No telling how many writes are lost due to lack of opportunity to capture them while they are fresh on poet's mind. The only minor change I would make would be in spacing at one spot :
somewhere drifting

alone

never even bumping....

I think isolating " alone " would add emphasis to it's meaning, course that's just my opinion lol..........scribbler