whitescatter
Dec 16, 2012

"Pantoum For The Christmas"

Everyone's searching for that magical star
As the world is waiting for that eve to come..
Others keep guessing where the three kings are..
The Giver of Light is just yet seen by some.

As the world is waiting for that eve to come..
Songs of the children fills up all the streets..
The Giver of Light is just yet seen by some.
On that eve,it will be all for those who fits.

Songs of the children fills up all the streets..
Touching the hearts with love and peace.
On that eve,it will be all for those who fits.
His sincere promise laid on the star-lit trees.

Touching the hearts with love and peace..
Others keep guessing where the three kings are..
His sincere promise laid on the star-lit trees.
Everyone's searching for that magical star.

About This Poem

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Laguna, PHL

Favorite Poets: William Shakespeare And the NeoPoet Family

More from this author

Comments

weirdelf

It's not Jesus' birthday it's the solstice, which has much more meaning in terms of the seasons, the coming of the light etc.

Also while giving gifts it is the highest suicide time of the year, why not practice love and giving all year?

The was no supernova anywhere near the time of Jesus supposed birth

They were not kings, they were four magi, magicians, and one of them was written out of the bible because he didn't believe in the virgin birth (and neither do I, what a travesty! Rape by god)

Saddest of all you say "On that eve,it will be all for those who fits."
Excluding all else. That is my biggest problem with Christianity and why I stopped being one at age 15