Nordic cloud
Nordic cloud
Mar 12, 2012
This poem is part of the workshop:

IMAGERY IN POETRY (for everyone)

(Read More...)

First Flower/Imagery Workshop.

Kinesthetic/ First flower.

See how snow edged woods
display such white array of dazzling carpets,
wide, beneath the taller bare twigged trees
they spread their happy bells,
full dresses for the ball,
the grand explosive dance of spring
revolving in a waltz,
to turn the minds of birds and beasts
upside down, downside up,
round and round the round about of growth,
that rises, slowly rises up to light.

About This Poem

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Oslo and Flatdal, Norway., NOR

Favorite Poets: Too daunting this.

More from this author

Comments

Debra Bryant

I like this, especially the lines;
"they spread their happy bells,
full dresses for the ball,
the grand explosive dance of spring
revolving in a waltz",
It demonstrates the imagery of movement very well indeed.
Deb

Nordic cloud

OOO I found the idea of Kinesthetic hard to understand and hoped I had nailed it, but hae-me-doots.
I had written a whole mass on different imagery ?? Labels and gleaned this out of a much longer piece, You know what flower it is, yes?

Thank you Deb, you encourage me, I haven't thought about what sort of images I use before, they come where they seem to fit automatically, but I suppose we had best be good and consistent.

Have you done one yet? Ann.

China Blue

motion all through this poem
first spreading
then the round and round I'm still dizzy from spinning lol
well done

what is the flower now you have me curious
Chrys

Debra Bryant

I would guess Daffodills but that is only because they are first to arrive here with "full bells" as in "dresses for a ball". Still love your imagery!
Deb

Nordic cloud

Where are you, that they are the first flowers?
They come at Easter for us in GB, but in May in Norway,
but then the climate changes now and is warmer,
the flowers go beserk, in N. its the coltsfoot on the acid earth,
that shares its nourishment with conifers.,
which here grow on granite glacial slabs.
Their dresses are not full blown like the daffodil,
they are more shaped ballet dresses,
with pointed uneven hems, quite modern in fact.
You in GB know which one's I mean, there
beside the snow. :) Ann

Nordic cloud

If you look up coltsfoot on the computer you will see that it is a little bright yellow sun, its petals fanning out from the button-like centre, where so many mini flower-lets make a cushion, its stem, (I have written a poem on this flower somewhere here) is very sturdy,green to purple in colour, the scales(!) round each other as the pillar of them climbs, they have tiny hairs to keep them warm in the snowy places they grow, they like acid soil and grow a gre deal on rubbish dumps and all the places other flowers shun, making them little reminders of nature in the hustle and bustle of city life, making the hurrying passer by smile a moment. Norwegian children come running in in late February, early March shouting "I have found the first flower!" And that is it.

Here it is:-

"THE COLTSFOOT"
Margaret Ann Waddicor 20th May 2011.

Coltsfoot flowered
your sun once bright
lighting up by day
at night closed tight

now white
your filigree fingers soft
like bottle brush slices
in a ring
of silvered tendrils
ravishing the wind

your wizened yellow petals cling one side
until a freak breeze stirs the trees
and carries all your pride
far and wide to places new
to plant your seed

while leaves
ten times as big grow tall
in Summer, Fall,
after all you're
belle of the ball
first footing in the snow

a stem of interlocking layers
so strong
with hairs to keep you warm
no man will do you harm
you stalwart little flower
a weed
the sunshine in our hour of need.

Love to you nordic cloud.
That isn't my flower here! :)

Nordic cloud

You didn't get it right Deb, it the snowdrop,
the one without the doubled petals that is not the wild original one.
It has four petals hanging down the central daffodil-like trumpet
edged with green, all at an angle to the ground like bells,
and also belles!

But the coltsfoot is charming too.

Ann

S

Very subtle use of kinetic, I would have been sorely tempted to include the flower swaying in a wind and quivering beneath a spring shower's raindrops. But this is much less in your face than most of my stuff. Please let a few more comments gather and then start thinking about whether you want to edit using kinetic or an imagery type of your own choosing........stan PS first flower here is yellow daffodil

Nordic cloud

By edit here do you mean rewrite it as it is,
or write another poem on the same theme using the same imagery making it even more explicit,
or writing another poem using a different imagery? Not quite with it!

Nordic cloud.

S

The choice is your whether to edit and stay with same imagery or to pretty much rewrite using as many types as you please. One choice will result in honing skills in one imagery and the other choice will give a chance to accent one imagery with others...........stan

Nordic cloud

wandering in woods
dancing under the trees
first flower

snow melting
the drips falling one by one
look a snowdrop

Revolving, evolving
this earth its changing coat
a flower

Just having fun stan! Ann.

S

This poem is a near perfect example of the type imagery used being almost entirely dependent of how the reader interprets the lines.........stan

Candlewitch

You take my breath away! Kenetic is very difficult. I also see visual imagery mixed in. I loved these lines:

they spread their happy bells,
full dresses for the ball,
the grand explosive dance of spring
revolving in a waltz,

always, Cat

Nordic cloud

Shall we dance together to celebrate the spring,
its not here yet
but the flowers have come from other parts of the world
to remind me of the species crocus that flowered in late February,
egg yellow inside and a russet brown outside,
more pointed petals and 3-4 flowers per bulb,
I loved them, I miss my garden in Devonshire.

All weathers, my old Gabardine mackintosh
with a piece of string round the waist,
buttons had gone long ago, I was out weeding,
as in Devonshire the weeds were rank,
but I always left any thing I didn't recognise
and sometimes it turned out to have a beautiful flower.

Ann