Night's Secret Beauty, Rare

The moonlight pales
in the wake of your existence,
it's nice to be allowed to see your face.

Treasured seconds, too short
I'm sorry to report,

Fate's not this generous with, "grace".

My shadowy thoughts
dare not boast my heart includes
the wondrous likes of you;

while the shadows play
time drifts away,

while your spirit holds the moment, "true".

Then, within the pale;
and empty, hollowed dreamscape
that's solely, only mine;

I'd pay the price
for a nectar so, nice;

OH! To sip of your sweet wine!

And as the dawn
yawns, and stretches, wide awake
in celebration of your very, name;

the evening may "flee"
but, you can't tell me,

"it" hadn't crossed your mind, just the same!

About This Poem

Last Few Words: On this particular night I met night's secret, beauty....rare....and, her name was...Honey-comb. docmaverick.

Style/Type: Structured: Western

Review Request Direction: What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - draft

About the Author

Region, Country: The High Desert, in the wild west, southern California, U.S. of A.., USA

Favorite Poets: Keates

Comments

Hello,

Good title! I like the way that you have structured your poem...the way the lines flow one to the next. Good rhymes. This piece sounds lovely and sincere when read aloud. My favorite lines:

Then, within the pale;
and empty, hollowed dreamscape
that's solely, only mine;

I'd pay the price
for a nectar so, nice;

OH! To sip of your sweet wine!
always, Cat

Ahh, my dearest Cat....

...you always did have a place in your heart for my "gentler", more "wistful" nature. Thanx for the encouragement. It's very nice to hear from you!
Sincerely,
doc.