Heavy Heart

with mark except for the "taking it lightly" part. words just come sometimes, and if they come from buried hurt or just that place you unconsciously keep rhymes, only you know. great work.
always,
mag

Very nice, and I like the presentation. Favorite lines:

into ashes. dodgeing glances
feeds the insecurity making intimidation................heavier

always, Cat

Sometimes the poems which I put the least effort into bring the greatest response. So don't be too fast to belittle a poem just because it came out effortlessly. I like the word as opposed to letter acrostic form. I would never have thought to use it. Only thing I'd suggest is to line up the acrostic words directly below each other but that's just a personal opinion....................stan

a pleasure to learn
the world has given birth,
to such lovely creative poets like you .

For me you are like a creative wonder,
like a volcano,
about to erupt and explode
poetic minds
to fragment human thought
into a creative venture,
of unique poetry .
God bless you

I like what you did with the writing of this poem.
My Grandaugther wrote something like this last year and I posted it here.
For me it is such a pleasant surprise to see young people write so well, it mean to me that the written word is not lost. I have copied and pasted my grandaugther poem for you to read, her name is Isabelle Pacis.

Nature’s Might

Mother earth teach me your ways,
Away
We go to meet your children,
Earthen
My mind and make me become one with you,
Too,
Many things to learn, but I wish to know,
Show
Me the world beneath my feet,
Greet
Me with your arms of light,
Smite
Those who come to abolish your knights,
Might!

Eddie
...

you don't even realise how powerful your expression is.
That last stanza is brilliant poetry
a kiss from gold.
the pleading grows strong enough to bend..................lead

gold shines, but is as soft and malleable as poisonous lead.

this structure you are using with the end words extended beyond the line, yet cohering is very clever. You could work with it more but don't restrict yourself to it.

May I suggest you read "Howl" by Ginsberg and I could probably recommend a few thousand other poets and poems.