China Blue
China Blue
Sep 06, 2011
This poem is part of the workshop:

Olympic Pool (initial workshop)

(Read More...)

Cold(Olympic Pool)

The touch that I once longed for
Now repulses

Lips once warm and sweet
Have turned calloused and cold

Little innuendos
now chafe and bite

Give them to another
For I no longer can
bear the thought of you

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: North Carolina, USA

Favorite Poets: Edgar Allen Poe

More from this author

Comments

Candlewitch

absolutely COLD! You could freeze water on it and make ice cubes! I love it and wouldn't change a word.

always, Cat

R

raj

13 years 7 months ago

nicely done...precise and yet effective..

K

Hi Chrys, hope you're mending well, and Lonnie's waiting on you hand and foot.

I don't know if I'm off target here, but if this were my poem, I'd change the last stanza,
to read:

Give them to another;
I no longer
bear the thought of you.

For me it's more precise. Good poem conveying the icy stare.

~A

lou

lou

13 years 7 months ago

Very chilly remind me not to get on your bad side LOL!!!!

Filled with ice cold hate, I personally wouldn't change a thing about it.

Lou