raj
Aug 28, 2011

Irene (ver 1.0)

(Please read "last few words")

why are you so enraged
leaving all in your trail
frail, fragile, screwed?

are you a nymph
aroused by titillation
of amorous waves?

Bah! you symbolize
feminine beauty and beast
in such stark contrast

once you sate your lust
you will breeze upon the ramp
like a beauty queen

About This Poem

Last Few Words: I wish to clarify that the Irene in this poem has no mythological connection but is just personification of hurricane Irene

Style/Type: Structured: Eastern

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Somewhere in the world, IND

More from this author

Comments

R

raj

13 years 8 months ago

thank you for the read..appreciate your thoughtful comment...

much love..

D

Dalton

13 years 8 months ago

I like it all but the word "ramp" in the last verse seems strange. Did you mean "rampage" or am I way of. Aside from that my favourite part is actually the last line "like a beauty queen". Nature is beautiful but so coldly destructive. She is as indiscriminate in who she cares for as to who she hurts. Where as people do discriminate. We plunder her for the materials that power our machines and poison her oceans and her atmosphere. A powerful piece of writing with moments of beauty. ThanX for sharing.

John

R

thank you for the read and thoughtful comments...

i have attempted to bring out both sides "beauty (breeze) and the beast (hurricane)..in this personification of Irene....hence the reference to her welcome beauty as if she is breezing past on a "ramp" as models do in a fashion parade...perhaps that part did not come out well enough in appeal...

appreciate your visit to my page...

D

Dalton

13 years 8 months ago

Ah I know better now. I should have thought a little harder before commenting.

Ta Mate

R

Smiles...

good to know it made sense on a re-read...