Antiquity
time unrelenting
personal passage
minutes movements
marked
Calendars...
pretty pictures
numbers of precision
pristine white pages
visual reminders...
Clocks...
ticking away measured lifetimes
bated, dated, bar-coded
scissors move to cut the threads...
Last Few Words: This poem is written for the book I am in the process of writing, titled: Mirror/rorriM under the name of C.M. Mattison.
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Well done Cat!
There's such a level of maturity and professionalism displayed here, that it is difficult to espouse each and every good point! The layout, the development of the theme of time and our human need to attempt to hold onto it, "contain" it, by whatever artificial means possible. Strikingly good piece, finished with a resounding metaphorical climax!
Splendid!
Boni
Hi Boni,
I think that at some time in all our lives we will become to some degree obsessed with time. Thank you for reading and responding.
always, Cat
Thanks, Rosi,
The concept of time... all consuming!
always, Cat
Dear Cat..
i liked the way you have defined Antiquity..Calendars and Clocks...it shows how we perceive the same things differently..thanks for sharing...
much love..
Thanks Raj,
I appreciate that you enjoyed this one! Thanks!
always, Cat
THE SUN
The moon and earth's revolution
define
time and birth of mankind
u have done well
to show us the path
How ignorant were we
Dear Loved,
It's a good thing we had Sun and Moon worshipers!
always, Cat