Candlewitch
Candlewitch
Nov 23, 2010

Haiku trio (Autumn)

Hush! It is evening
Nature paints her landscapes
Colors goldenrod

Autumnal changes
Ecliptic intersections
Bringing natures' dance

The autumnal feast
From the horn of plenitude
Serves celebration

About This Poem

Style/Type: Structured: Eastern

Review Request Direction: How was my language use?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Northwestern Wisconsin USA, USA

Favorite Poets: Edgar Allan Poe

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More from this author

Comments

Geezer

Geezer

14 years 5 months ago

nice theme , that fused all three. Have to go look at rules, for the technicals, but they sound so smooth, They must be right! ~ Love ya, ~ Gee

D

Dalton

14 years 5 months ago

I'm never sure of the technical details of writing haikus. It takes a very tight structure. But Kerouac said we don't have to follow the rules of the haiku to the letter as they were ordered and are governed by the rules of another language. I think you have achieved something special here. John

Candlewitch

Thank you for that bit of information on Kerouac, it sounds wise to me. I appreciate your visitation and response.

always, cat

Race_9togo

Distinct shades of Samhain all through these.
Most excellent.

S

I am glad to see I'm not the only one who finds Haiku better in series. Well done........scribbler

lou

lou

14 years 5 months ago

They evoke the crisp coolnes of Autumn, pure and beautiful.

Lou xx

mand

mand

14 years 5 months ago

I don't know much about Haiku, but I do know that this is a beautiful poem.

Love Mand xxxxxx

Nordic cloud

Wind tossed colours three,
regale the page here Candlewitch,
bewitching our minds...... a moment as the haiku do,

I like your kind of haiku very much,
this is lovely, the brush of nature
painting the golden rods ,
that flower so late into the fall,
their rods of ochre gold can be saved
for Winter months, as decoration and
with other flowers, they all fade to the most
delicate tints and shades of their former selves.

The second and third one's I like too,
the second making one think....ecliptic intersections,
lovely way of ushering the Autumn in.
You have exactly got the 5/7/5,
admirable indeed.

You usher us in with your hush!
And we hush....
to read.
Thank you Candlewitch with my love Ann.

Z

ziggy

14 years 5 months ago

hi cat I have missed this as I have had my head
stuck in that wonderful book its a real trill
to have it , I love the way you have knit these words together here
much love ,.,,,,,,,,,,,,,zigs x

Candlewitch

Thank you for reading and commenting. I'm so glad you are enjoying the book! Don't let it keep you up nights ;)

Love Cat

Hooded Stranger

Hooded Stranger

14 years 5 months ago

Cat,

perfectly crafted lines...worked well as a set of three.

I'm not a fan of Haiku, but I can't knock these ones I have no idea of the technicalities and rules, but I remember a member of Neopoet (doorman) who seemed to be an expert in Haiku. Sod rules anyway, they are only made to be broken afterall.

I was waiting for Styx to show up in the last one and destroy the tranquil setting!!...Lol!

Why is Autumn special to you?

regards,

HS

Candlewitch

Candlewitch

14 years 5 months ago

Every now and then I feel the need to write something "normal" as apposed to my usual whacked-out fare. I love the autumn because the intense heat of summer is over and the leaves on the trees change color. I also love Halloween (Samhain I hope I spelled that correctly, pronounced sowin) which is the birthday of Eddy Styx.)

love, cat

R

raj

14 years 1 month ago

I agree totally with Geeser...it is a wonderful fusion of Haikus and creates the wonderful moods of Autumn in its glory...i enjoyed it. immensely..