Alternative

Nietzche talks of the spirit and here you speak of it as well, the fact that our spirit is the one thing we own and control for the happiness of ourselves. I like the abstract surreal feel of this and the lack of morality and judgement in it to accept that in this world we 'be' rather than judge. I don't know whether the ellipses is warranted but they are a pet hate of mine so take that or leave it, I enjoyed the write.

scriptures all demand
with dire consequence
are unrelenting truth,
or bloodless verity
turned overpowering
with dogmatic certainty
of chance existence
in overarching arrogance.

truer words were never spoken! (you have touched on one of my "HOT BUTTONS" and I could go on for hours, but will spare you here, lol!) My favorite lines are:

And yet there is a joy
to set against
this humorless dichotomy,
a burgeoning delight
to widen mind and heart
in rising satisfactions
all-encompassing:

All is energy.

always, Cat

you hit on a good one with this write
I feel its one that begs a few more reads
strong thoughts and wording, I do like this
it seems you put a lot of thought in to this write
with lines like these,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
"We perceive all crowded spaces
of our busy lives
as mere instances
of physicality,
divorced by ojectivity,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,is that objectivity ,,,,,,,,,,or a word I don't know lol maybe
and this "And yet there is a joy
to set against
this humorless dichotomy,
a burgeoning delight
to widen mind and heart
in rising satisfactions
all-encompassing:"
always good to read you, when I have time lol,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,cheers ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,zigs

nothing contrived here. All leads to the last line, the true heart of this write I think, very naturally..........stan

Dear Pagan Poet,

this just flows off the tongue and with a similar thought as Stan, it runs its course and leads you to the perfect ending, which is the heartbeat of the whole piece.

Suitably rounded and structured.

I looked for places where it could be tightened up...and you know what...it is all there and needs nothing I can see to improve it, and believe me I tried to find something!

regards,

HS

is breath taking use of imagery and vocabulary.

love lou

This poem is one which Joe would like to see, but he has gone.
You have taken us through the halls of "truth and wisdom," and drawn us into the deep, to send us sailing into higher places where the nature of the universe, its spirit, our spirit, takes its rightful place in the scheme of things.

Just now having been a 3hr. walk, I saw the old rusty lorry become beautiful and bits of wagons in old iron, they were tidying the area and we are afraid that they might take those bits away, as without them they will totally disturb the spirit of the place.

Your comment about the pillar in the sand you answer yourself in the later comment, where all is made straight. I like these two quotes.

"You know me - an old pagan with Neo tendancies, toe-ing that Middle-Pillar line in the dogmatic sands of belief, lol."

Oh Jim your toes dragging in the sands of time through the history of mankind, or unkind.

"Glance into the world just as though time were gone: and everything crooked will become straight to you."

Although, is there anything straight as a straight line 'round' the earth is an elipse. All our straight paths, ways, bend. Just as our ideas are moulded and remoulded from generation to generation, each era thinking up its own answers to the universal problem as to why, who and what we, and it all, are.

I so enjoyed the poem and all the comments here, a good one to set us thinking Jim thank you.
I have played too much with this as I felt it needed the closeness-giving-substance, not sure what I mean by that, but the layout of the words could be slightly improved to separate the meanings, specially for someone with a mind like mine! Suspect!

Excuse my liberty Jim, just ignore me. :) LuvAnn

Mono-cultured, molded hard by centuries
of God and Science

to fit all narrow views of harsh judgemental rule

and smug sureties of so-called facts,... THE smug sureties+

we move through life


as sightless as smooth worms
through blinding earth or blackest ocean,

segmented lives squirmed lightless underneath,
impossible twin depths

of scientific fact and doctrinal belief.

We perceive all crowded spaces of our busy lives

as mere instances of physicality,

divorced by objectivity,

dogma, reason or heresy

from any wider scope or unfettered hope


beyond harsh limited designs of frowning dieties...deities!

scriptures all demand with dire consequence

are unrelenting truth, or bloodless verity

turned overpowering with dogmatic certainty

of chance existence in overarching arrogance.

We know suffering as punishment,

pain and lust and shame...do you need the first AND?

as retribution for old sins,

or living beings

merely happenstance,


Order only random chance,

gatherings of chaos

where life only occurrs...occurs?

by unchosen circumstance.

And yet there is a joy to set against

this humorless dichotomy,

a burgeoning delight to widen mind and heart

in rising satisfactions all-encompassing:

Cars we drive are not just mere machines,

paths we walk are not unliving,

water's not just chemical compound,

earth is not just lifeless ground,

the air we breathe is not mere matter:

the stones we skip across a river,


the ripples widening where they touch,

books and papers,facts and figures,...gap before facts?

loves and hates,farms and wastes

mountains, deserts,memories and fates,

everything is filled with spirit.

Everything's alive.

Maybe another bit:- ""All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth." Nietzsche.