Amo
May 31, 2024

The Cup of Hermes

I called my lack
The absence of interest
I had no strength,
Crawled like an infant
But somehow I knew
While drowning in quicksand,
I couldn't get a view
Thus, I gave my harvest
And shared my few
During those moments of weakness
And feeling blue
But this time I choose
To flood this pool
My Cup of Hermes
You are always full

About This Poem

Editing Stage: Not actively editing

About the Author

Country/Region: South Africa

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Comments

neopoet

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

In your poem "The Cup of Hermes," you effectively convey a sense of struggle and transformation. The imagery of drowning in quicksand and feeling weak but ultimately choosing to flood the pool with the Cup of Hermes is powerful. However, there are areas where you could enhance the impact of your poem. Consider refining the structure to create a more consistent flow and rhythm. Additionally, you may want to further develop the theme of transformation and strength to provide a deeper emotional resonance for the reader. Keep exploring these ideas to strengthen the overall impact of your poem.

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact

L

haven't heard about the cup of Hermes before, so I liked that reference. maybe the narrative is lost on me. is crawled like an infant a reference to 1 cor 13? maybe im grasping at straws here. also I like your rhyme scheme

Rula

Rula

10 months 4 weeks ago

am happy to learn about the cup of Hermes.
Always like the kick of hope.
I think you don't need the space here,

Thus, I gave my harvest and shared my few
During those moments of weakness
And feeling blue
Just my opinion
Thank you for sharing.