I was with a woman
some time ago, who wore her love
like a pistol on her hip.
With her suspicious heart for ammunition,
one inevitable wrong move by me
and I was going to be done for.
Pretty soon I stopped
trying to avoid her aim.
She had already put holes
where we needed to breathe.
Last Few Words:
Style/Type: Free verse
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft
Comments
you’ve done it again!! Every
you’ve done it again!! Every poem I’ve read is far of yours has me transfixed. I love the metaphor you used here!
my favorite line is:
wore her love
like a pistol on her hip.
Thank you for sharing!
-MM
Very kind MM - thank you and
Very kind MM - thank you and appreciate your comments!
Best
Dear Michael,
That is one smokin' Hot woman!!! keep her in front of you, let her take the lead, lol!
*hugs, Cat
*ever, eddy
Hahaha - accurate! Best
Hahaha - accurate!
Best
So nice of her...
Yeah, they don't aim for killing shots or specific targets, they just squeeze off a few rounds ever so often, in the general vicinity of anything they think might be a threat. ~ Geez.
.
Although, her aim was nothing
Although, her aim was nothing to be ignored - LOL! Thanks for stopping by Geez!
Best