Albuquerque

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem "Albuquerque" demonstrates a strong sense of place and atmosphere, with vivid imagery that effectively conveys the experience of a hot air balloon ride. However, there are areas where the poem could be improved.

The first line, "Early in October / balloons began to disappear," suggests a narrative or event that is not fully developed in the rest of the poem. If the disappearing balloons are a significant part of the poem's message or theme, it might be helpful to elaborate on this idea or weave it more consistently throughout the poem.

The poem does a good job of using sensory details to create a vivid picture of the balloon ride and the surrounding landscape. However, some of the language could be more specific or original. For example, "the glorious sunset" and "the wonder of the colored balloons" are somewhat clichéd phrases that could be replaced with more unique or surprising descriptions.

The rhythm and rhyme scheme of the poem are generally consistent, which helps to create a sense of flow and movement. However, there are a few lines that disrupt this rhythm, such as "The city streets were shining / as cars passed slowly down below." Adjusting these lines to fit the poem's established rhythm could improve its overall musicality.

Lastly, the poem could benefit from a stronger conclusion. The final line, "had given us a show," feels somewhat anticlimactic after the vivid descriptions and sensory details of the preceding lines. A more impactful or thought-provoking ending could leave a stronger impression on the reader.

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact

I am looking forward to reading this after the rework!

*hugs, Cat