Night of the gigantic burrito's

The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:

The poem "Night of the gigantic burritos" presents an interesting narrative, with a clear progression of events that maintains reader interest. However, there are several areas where the poem could benefit from further refinement.

1. Consistency in Tone: The poem begins with a light-hearted, almost whimsical tone, but abruptly shifts to a more serious, dangerous situation. While such shifts can be effective, in this case, it seems a bit jarring. The transition could be smoother or the tone could be more consistent throughout.

2. Imagery: The poem could benefit from more vivid and specific imagery. For example, instead of simply stating "Tattoos and scars ran across his arms," the poem could delve into what these tattoos and scars look like, what they might signify, etc. This would help to flesh out the character of Beto and make the scene more immersive.

3. Rhythm and Rhyme: The poem's rhythm and rhyme scheme are somewhat inconsistent. Some lines rhyme while others do not, and the rhythm varies from line to line. Establishing a more consistent rhythm and rhyme scheme could enhance the poem's musicality and flow.

4. Punctuation: The poem could use more consistent punctuation. There are several lines that end without any punctuation, which can make the poem difficult to read and disrupt its rhythm.

5. Show, Don't Tell: The poem often tells the reader what is happening, rather than showing it through descriptive language. For example, instead of saying "We knew right then It was the end of our fun," the poem could describe the characters' reactions and feelings in that moment.

6. Conclusion: The ending of the poem could be stronger. The final line, "of how it all went down!" is a bit vague and doesn't provide a satisfying resolution to the narrative. The poem could benefit from a more detailed or impactful conclusion.

Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact

more rhyme, this could be really good. I love the tale of a night out on the town with the boys. I kept looking for the rhyme that I know is under all the rhythm. ~ Geezer.
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Alot of anger.
But,fuck haters.
Be as angry as you want.

I like the feeling this poem evoked within me.

This is great, I can see where your writing is developing and improving and you're doing a great job Ruby :) xx

A fun, quirky title and poem. I agree about the rhyme - I wanted more!
I'll be back to see what you do with this one!
L