Lavender
Lavender
Nov 12, 2023
This poem is part of the workshop:

Earn A Poem Workshop 1

(Read More...)

A Host of Sandhill Cranes

Two hundred Sandhill
Cranes flew by
to decorate the
southbound sky,
to soar,
to flee,
to freely fly
off to a warmer mire.

And as I watched
the sedge move on
from roosts of colts
now so forgone
from nest
to sky,
to freely fly,
my own heart carried higher.

I wondered where
they'd find their stay
through winter's plight
so cold and gray,
to rest,
to stretch,
to freely fly
as nature would aspire.

So many more
have come to pass
these sleeping trees,
this labored grass,
and though I longed,
I did not ask
to freely fly
as was my soul's desire.

When winter's wind
breaks through the panes
I'll dream about
the Sandhill Cranes
and I shall soar,
to flee,
to freely fly,
and touch the heavens, nigher.

About This Poem

Last Few Words: I usually hear these beauties before I see them up above. L

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: United States

Favorite Poets: I tend to read Ted Kooser

This user supports Neopoet so it can be free to all

More from this author

Comments

RoseBlack

Of the sandhill cranes soaring to their winter destination! To be as free as they are and to pick up and relocate as they see fit! The imagery paints such a grand picture! As always, excellent form, flow and use of language. I can imagine the liberating feeling watching them fly away. Great job

Alex Tanner

Very descriptive, unfortunately not a bird we get here, only magpies, rooks and pigeons in any quantity. Oh! I nearly forgot the raucous greedy gulls. Loved it. Alex

Ruby Lord

Hey Lavender, I don't know why, but the hair on my neck suddenly prickled as I got to the end of your poem. That was fantastic, I loved it. Well done, Ruby :) xx

Leslie

I am well acquainted with these majestic birds.
They used to fly right over us and land right behind the school yard where I worked. Unmistakable call! What a breath-taking poem.

Lavender

I've only seen them from a distance. We are located along their migratory route and they gather in the thousands several hours away from us. I really need to make the trip to see them. (On my bucket list) Yes, their trilling call is invigorating! You can hear it long before you see them!
L

Candlewitch

The title of this poem bothers me. It is the number "Two Hundred". I am wondering if you could use something that flows better, like; A Host Of, or A Multitude Of? I think this finely crafted work of art deserves a more fitting introduction. (a title is an introduction) it is fine in the first lines of the piece.

The repeated lines, in the body of the poem flow well and add texture. they are the heart of the piece. I really like this poem because of them. my favorite lines are:

So many more
have come to pass
these sleeping trees,
this labored grass,
and though I longed,
I did not ask
to freely fly
as was my soul's desire.

I found closure at the ending. this poem made me feel good as if a cloud had lifted.

*hugs, Cat

Lavender

Thank you for the lovely suggestion! I really like "A Host..." and will gratefully use it!
Thanks, again!
L