What beauty comes at last with Fall
When golden hour is best of all -
Where autumn’s light set trees aglow
With shimmering shades and bright yellow,
And where each backdrop’s reddish scene
Is sprinkled with some evergreen.
It seems to be a magic sign
When colors clash against the pine,
And temperatures begin to change
While verdant hillsides rearrange.
It’s when there’s splendor by a lake,
And when there’s piles of leaves to rake;
There’re pumpkin patches plain in view,
And frost that chills each morning dew.
What beauty comes at last with Fall
When sunflowers grow up nice and tall,
And sway in fields where asters grow
With purple heads lined in a row -
Where butterflies swim in the air,
And dance amongst the clover there.
There’s wonder in a mountain scene
With quilt like colors in between
The peaks, the ranges, and the sky
Where downy cotton clouds drift by.
There’re crisp clean chills felt in each breeze
While gently fall the sun scorched leaves;
An amber tinge to morning’s haze,
And maple leaves glow with a blaze.
What beauty comes at last with Fall
As God repaints His earthen ball
With touches made with red and gold?
It is a wonder to behold.
But though I’m no authority -
I know God did this all for me.
Comments
Neopoet AI (premium) - 5-29-23 version
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
The poem "At Last With Fall" is a descriptive piece that captures the essence of the autumn season. The use of vivid imagery and sensory details effectively conveys the beauty and transformation that occurs during this time of year.
However, there are some areas that could be improved. The rhythm of the poem could be more consistent. Some lines are longer than others, which disrupts the flow. For example, "There’s wonder in a mountain scene/With quilt like colors in between" has a different rhythm than "The peaks, the ranges, and the sky/Where downy cotton clouds drift by."
The use of clichés could also be minimized. Phrases such as "golden hour" and "God repaints His earthen ball" are commonly used in poetry and other forms of writing. Using more original expressions or metaphors could make the poem more unique and engaging.
The poem also ends with a personal reflection, "But though I’m no authority -/I know God did this all for me." This shift in perspective is abrupt and could be more smoothly integrated into the poem. The personal reflection could be expanded upon or introduced earlier in the poem to create a more cohesive narrative.
Lastly, the poem could benefit from more varied sentence structures. Most lines start with "And" or "Where," which can become repetitive. Varying the sentence structures can make the poem more dynamic and interesting to read.
Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact
At Last With Fall
Much to love with this. The imagery is vivid and delightful. Quite a beautiful painting! The rhyme is tight and logical, not forced. What intrigues me the most, though, is the structure. A six line stanza followed by two four lines stanzas. Repeated, and then the poem ends in another six line stanza. A lovely flow and rhythm which adds to the charm of this poem.
Thank you!
L
Thank you again for your
Thank you for your lovely commentary. I am glad that you enjoyed this fall poem. Yes, I deliberately mixed up the meter and structure of this poem for a bit of variety along with some line repetition for emphasis. I was inspired by the splendid autumn colors I saw while driving on the Blue Ridge Parkway in October some years ago. Thank you again for visiting and for sharing your thoughts on this poem today.