By the light of the morning sun
And the peace of all that's begun
Calmness stirs up hope emotion
In absence of chaos commotion
No whirling thoughts around my mind
But stillness that's the comforting kind.
Even breaths escape in gentle swathes
Unaware of the joy it gratefully saves.
Birds sing tunefully up high in a tree
And in this moment it grounds me.
Sending warm waves of gladness
Pushing out any thoughts of sadness.
Comments
Neopoet AI (premium) - 5-29-23 version
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
Title: Morning thoughts
In this poem, the speaker describes the tranquility of a morning scene and its effects on their emotions. The poem effectively conveys a sense of calmness and peace through its imagery and language. Here are a few suggestions to strengthen the poem further:
1. The poem's structure consists of four quatrains with an AABB rhyme scheme. While this structure works well for the poem's theme, consider experimenting with different line lengths or stanza structures to create more variety and interest.
2. In the first stanza, the phrase "peace of all that's begun" is a bit vague. Consider revising this line to provide a more concrete image or idea that contributes to the overall sense of calmness.
3. The second stanza introduces the idea of stillness and calmness in the speaker's mind. To strengthen this stanza, consider adding more specific imagery or sensory details that illustrate this stillness.
4. The third stanza effectively uses imagery to convey the calming effect of the morning scene. However, the phrase "escape in gentle swathes" might be difficult for some readers to visualize. Consider revising this line to provide a clearer image of the speaker's breaths.
5. In the final stanza, the poem concludes with the speaker feeling grounded and experiencing a sense of gladness. To make this conclusion more powerful, consider exploring the speaker's emotions in greater depth or providing a more vivid image that encapsulates the poem's theme of tranquility.
Overall, the poem effectively conveys the calming effects of a peaceful morning scene. By refining the imagery and exploring the speaker's emotions more deeply, the poem can become even more engaging and evocative.
Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact
Your title is good, it
Your title is good, it reminds me of those early morning Zen kind of things one used to see/hear
before and during a yoga lesson on T.V. I might add a stanza to bring the whole thought
full circle and explain that a calm, beginning to the day helps to keep you productive and able to
function better throughout the rest of the day. All in all, a rather benign and bland kind of thing.
~ Geezer.
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