And the letter started off, Dear John
I've been thinking about you too
see, I've discovered I can make it
without having to deal with you
No more explaining where I went
I don't need to lie again
Make excuses or hide away
hold my heart together in pain
When you come home this time
I certainly won't be here
I'm through with living a lie
and I don't want to live in fear
You were my big mistake
but now, it's goodbye dear John
No more tears and lies
Dear John, I'm moving on
Comments
Neopoet AI (premium)
The below is a computer generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
out of 5 stars
The poem "A Letter to Dear John... May Challenge" is a powerful and emotional piece that speaks to the heartache and pain of a failed relationship. The speaker addresses their former lover, John, and expresses their newfound sense of independence and strength. The language is simple and direct, which adds to the impact of the words.
One potential line edit that could enhance the poem would be to change "You were my big mistake" to "Our love was a mistake." This small change shifts the focus from solely blaming John for the relationship's failure to acknowledging the shared responsibility for the mistake. It also adds a layer of complexity to the speaker's emotions and shows a deeper understanding of the situation.
Overall, "A Letter to Dear John... May Challenge" is a well-crafted poem that effectively captures the pain and liberation that comes with letting go of a toxic relationship. It is a relatable and poignant piece that will resonate with many readers.
Please send feedback about Neo (our computer generated critique system) to https://www.neopoet.com/contact
Thanks...
but the line stays the same; it was all John's fault. He was a bore that was too controlling, and I was sick of his shit! ~ Geezer.
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Interesting title..
Good writing,
Max
Sir Gee
I know this has some cultyreal background. "John"as a name, does it refer to a particular thing?
The term...
A Dear John letter is a letter written to a man by his wife or romantic partner to inform him that their relationship is over, usually because his partner has found another lover. The man is often a member of the military stationed overseas, although the letter may be used in other ways, including being left for him to discover when he returns from work to an emptied house.
Origin and etymology
While the exact origins of the phrase are unknown, it is commonly believed to have been coined by Americans during World War II. "John" was the most popular and common baby name for boys in America every single year from 1880 through 1923,[1] making it a reasonable placeholder name when denoting those of age for military service. Large numbers of American troops were stationed overseas for many months or years, and as time passed many of their wives or girlfriends decided to begin relationships with new men, rather than to wait for the soldiers to return.
As letters to servicemen from wives or girlfriends back home would typically contain affectionate language (such as "Dear Johnny", "My dearest John", or simply "Darling"), a serviceman receiving a note beginning with a curt "Dear John" when accustomed to a warmer greeting would instantly be aware of the letter's purpose.[2] Thanks for the read and comments, Rula. I intended this poem to reflect the attitude of a lady who was in a relationship with a man who was controlling and very demanding, wanting to know every move she made throughout her day; accounting for every moment. ~ Geezer.
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Sounds
like John had this letter coming. Now....Again> Pain.I'm sure you are aware this require a real stretch to really rhyme but I'm also confident you can cure this
I know that...
the southern accent makes this A/gin, but in Yankeeland, we say; A/gayn. It stays the same. Thanks for the read and comment Stan. ~ Geez.
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This has a familiar tone
Well done! I think you captured the concept of Dear John right on! I remember a story my dad told me about his old partner in Vietnam and a dear John letter he received..but it wasn't until he got home and found the letter taped to the front door. Wife and kids were gone with her new lover. But such was the times! Great write.
This one wasn't...
a war-story "Dear John", it was simply a matter of a woman who has had enough of a mean-spirited, controlling husband who had accused her of cheating, [without reason] controlled every move she made, and in general, made life miserable. I don't know if she had another lover or escape plan, but she decided that enough was enough. Thanks for the read and comment. ~ Geez.
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I knew
it sounded familiar and I am pretty sure she has another lover and an escape plan, in case the lover abandons ship. I am sorry I went off the cuff on my comment. It was early morning, very little sleep and a whole lot of pent up emotion. It was well done and as I said, very familiar.
Never thought...
that you were "off the cuff" with your comment and didn't mean to sound as though you missed the point. I just wanted to point out, that not every "Dear John" letter is necessarily about someone connected to the military. I would refer to any such letter
as a D.J. ~ Geez.
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No worries
I think I am just off today. This was a definitely a good challenge!
Has the Bot has started
Has the Bot has started imagining and elaborating on the stories in our poems?
"This small change shifts the focus from solely blaming John for the relationship's failure to acknowledging the shared responsibility for the mistake."
I think the Bot's opinion is narrow and limited to the examples it is learning from, so, it is using a recent example and it can't see beyond that until it learns from another example?
But I did enjoy your poem, only thing I spotted was this; I certainly won't be here. Maybe think about using a stronger word instead of certainly, definitely perhaps?
Well crafted and the message was clear. Ruby :)
The Bot
couldn't even come up with anything nice to say about mine so it said nothing at all!
It isn't perfect but I think
It isn't perfect but I think we are seeing and learning its limitations. If it responded how we expected, maybe that would be more of an issue to worry about. For now, I think the learning part is being overwhelmed, we should take advantage of it ha ha. Ruby :)
Dearest Bro
This is a Dear John letter that many could relate to. In the end there is always some tears and sometimes fears.
Kudos on a really good write.
Good luck in the competition!
Love and higgliest bugs xxx
I have seen...
many situations, that warranted a Dear John letter, some that worked and some that didn't. A couple that ended tragically.
I never got one, because I always thrashed it out in person. Thanks for the read and comment. Love and higgest bugs~ Geez.
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