Where the devil did I put it?
I had it here last night
I know I put it on the shelf
But now it's not in sight.
Which one of you has moved it?
I know it was not I
Someone must have picked it up
And somewhere else let lie.
Oh! Where the devil is it?
You know the thing I mean
A rusty wooden handle
And head of mottled green.
What do you mean I did not
Put the thing away
I scarcely ever forget things
So what is that you say.
Ok, so just this morning
From the butchers I came back
Alright upon the counter
I left the lamb: a rack.
Yes I know that yesterday
To the bakers I was sent
And returned without the sourdough,
What sort of bread is that.
I'm getting really angry now
See, I've kicked the cat
He knows just how irate I get
Don't look at me like that.
Yes, Ok I'll calm down
I'll have a cup of tea
I'll read the paper, where's my glasses?
You know I cannot see.
Oh God where have I put them?
I had them moments ago
Why do you look at me like that?
I'm wearing them, Oh No!
Comments
I Disremembers
Hello, Alex,
Your title intrigued me, and your poetry did not disappoint! I've lived this life, too! I really like the lighthearted nature.
Enjoyed this!
L
May I suggest your 5th stanza be aligned like the rest?
Ok, so just this morning
from the butcher's I came back
alright upon the counter
I left a lamb, a rack
I Disremembers
Hello L. I have edited as your suggestion. The title comes from an expression used by the old timers of the past here on the Island. I often heard my grandfather use it. he never said 'I forget', always 'I disremembers'. I have a book dated 1854 called 'The Dialect of the Isle of Wight' and I am thinking of writing something in dialect, challenging but could be fun. Alex.
Hello, Alex,
That would be an interesting write. How wonderful!
L
Yep...
I'm not quite that forgetful, but I've noticed
when I'm stressed out, I tend to forget more than usual.
When I was wearing bi-focals, I tended to forget that I had them on
once-in-awhile. I wore them in the shower once or twice!
LoL
~ Geezer.
.
I Disremembers
Ah! Geezer, the fun of getting old. Alex
I Disremembers
Hello Kat, good to know it's not just us oldies who are getting more forgetful but it does happen more often. Glad you enjoyed. Alex.
This is great
Some days I feel as though I would lose my head if it wasn't attached! This made me smile. Good job!
I Disremembers
Hello Rose, I lost mine years ago, wish I knew where it was. Alex
Awesome punchline
Excellent patience and great delivery. Very creative and really relatable.
Tim
I Disremembers
Hello Tim, Thanks for your kind words but I'm sorry I don't know who Rita is. Alex
Rita is a typo
She is a figment of an autocorrect imagination.
I laughed!
And sympathized greatly!! My memory for where I have put things is absolutely the horrible, and the glasses being on the face is the perfect final touch. What a delightfully light, entertaining poem!