Red, orange, pink and blue,
these colors make me think of you.
The sun rests and the moon wakes,
the clouds cover the dying rays.
The color will die, and darkness will ensue,
but I'll always keep the thought of you.
Jan 25, 2023
Colors
About This Poem
Review Request Direction:
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Agree with Kat
We could do a few tweaks to make it super tight but it’s fairly smooth as is.
Well done,
Tim
hello DreamBug,
it is nice to meet you! all of your colors are in the brighter spectrum. you are probably an upbeat person and poet. a good read. thank you for sharing.
*hugs, Cat
Always glad...
to see you! I wish you would write more. ~ Geezer.
.
Colors
Hello, DreamBug,
I, too, like the brevity of this. It seems the message is clear, and very tender.
Thank you!
Lavender