Simon
Simon
Jan 22, 2023

Time to die

the clouds form and disappear
the sun rises but definitely sets
as the night darkens the moon glitters
yet the dawn awakens with it's light
and rainbow never stop the rainy season
for nature has it's own laws

the rain wets the land
and dryness harshen it by season
lives and greenery fill the earth
as trees and flowers and grasses
bud but loses their prime at autumn
all has time and period that's aside

for we all have lives
but death awaiting beneath
embrace the reality for nothing is forever
low swing low, home oh sweet home
fare well the dying day
sleep, rest at peace and journey beyond.

About This Poem

Last Few Words: The poem is for the dead, we all have period and time in our live, the time to born and time to die.

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Nigeria , abuja

Favorite Poets: Any good poet of my likening

More from this author

Comments

lovedly

it is you
u needn't listen to me
for that matter anybody

but still try to live in a glamorous world
death one can never hide
'tis absurd to say I won't die
we al are in Q
death will view

Candlewitch

awaken(s)
rainbow stops the season of rain
(not )for nature has it's own laws

two small changes that improve the flow. a very good poem Simon, I like it very much!

* hugs, Cat
*ever, eddy I love the darker poetry. death is the flip side of life. keep writing.

lovedly

jess said
try and avoid 'the'
as much as you can
every word in poetry counts
Pardon me for this inclusion...
We all are in a learning curve...
what else is Neo meant for