Emerald1
Dec 17, 2022
This poem is part of the contest:

Neopoem Of The Week Contest December 11th to 17th 2022

(Read More...)

Winter Dreaming

There's a blizzard outside
Home alone
After dark cuddled in a blanket
On her luxurious chair with room for two

Hot chocolate with liberal brandy and marshmallows cupped in her hands
Book of the story of Layla and Qays on her lap
The hot drink lulling her and awakening her in equal measure

The velvet chocolate heat and the hit of the brandy making her feel
all marshmallowy soft with liquid heat radiating from top to toe

The tragic romance of layla and Qays floating in her brain starts her
wondering why she is alone here.
Not wrapped in a lovers arms warmed by his body with
the flames of the fire dancing on their shadows as they
explore what they had been gifted in their meeting.

Layla and Qays were separated by family and society
in different times to hers , ancient taboos and family power
decided relationships in their world and when their love was
thwarted they lived their individual miseries ever after.

But why was she alone, no tragic story of unrequited love,
deaths, family expectations.

Was she too fussy, too difficult too insecure,
too much baggage, too little something, too much maybe.
Has she painted herself a picture of her ideal man
one who doesn't exist, handsome, strong sexy,
intelligent sensitive, caring, a poet a lover a superhero
the best bits of all she has ever known an ideal
no man could live up to while all she is offering
is her totally perfectly imperfect self

The brandy is warming her body and her requirements in her man
are slipping away one by one as she watches
the dying embers throw up one last flame
She has cut her male companions required attributes
down considerably as she muses on why she is really here alone,
All she really wants is a guy who is romantic, definitely poetic,
caring and well spoken and can tolerate and come to love
all her perfect imperfections.
Maybe the next blizzard she won't be sitting here alone
reading tragic love stories, She will be writing hers in the shadows of the dancing flames.
One can dream, another shot she falls asleep and finds her man.

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Not actively editing

About the Author

Country/Region: Ireland

This user supports Neopoet so it can be free to all

More from this author

Comments

Ray Whitaker

Remarkable in it's narrative, and focus. I have really enjoyed this!

Unusual thrust as well. I mean the rhetorical questions are many, and only she can really answer them. A much appreciated inquiry,

Geezer

Your title is good, the theme announced and delivered.
The language is plain, with no doubt left as to what was said or implied.
Love the theme! The beginning is perfect, setting the scene and flowing well
with an introduction to the main question and leaving the end for the hope of
next year. Nice stuff. ~ Geezer.
.

E

Hi really appreciate your positivity ,one thing about whatever I pen its meaning will always be apparent my brain doesn't have one abstract cell in it ,so.plain language and understandable narratives ae guaranteed if you revisit Emerald 1

Candlewitch

as it gives a big hint to the subject matter. and the way you laid it out as sections helped the reader to understand the story better. I liked the straight talk, it had a No Nonsense feel to it. your style of writing is clear and to the point. thanks for the invigorating read....excellent!

*hugs, Cat

Lavender

Hello, Emerald,
This is a tender read, and enjoyable to follow along in her thoughts. I like your title very much. Clever last line, too.
Thank you!
L

Rula

Rula

2 years 4 months ago

Thank you for sharing this one, which I thought is kinda prose than poetry. I am grateful that you've intoduced the story of "Qays and Layla" ,which is of Arabic origins
to our English fellow poets .
I especially very much liked the last few lines.
Looking forward to reading more of your works

RoseBlack

I love how the story unfolds and the author's reading causes her to pause and consider her own life for a moment. Really good job!