Alex Tanner
Alex Tanner
Dec 11, 2022

Thoughts as Twilight Falls

These futile words what can they mean?
Any fool can hope and dream,
Put pen to paper, easy to do.
But it takes a man to see dreams through.

Am I a Man?
I sometimes wish I could be more than shape and form,
What should I fear as darkness falls?
Soon night must come, and then,
No more.

Not true, I shall be all I loved,
In them I live as memories,
As my bones in the grave decay as rust,
So I live on though my flesh be dust.

And you my love,
My angel.
Fair as any that walked this earth.
Will you recall,
When I am gone those sweet,sweet times we spent alone?

Or will your memory of me fade?.
As lands eroded by creeping tides.
For death will have his way and I’m
afraid,
You will forget.

About This Poem

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft

About the Author

Country/Region: Isle of Wight United Kingdom

Favorite Poets: Poe

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Comments

Geezer

have the wish, that we are remembered. We claim our territory amongst the living and wonder if we will be ousted by the new memories. Will there be just a little spot for us? The divide between the two realms cannot be pierced and so we cannot know.
I would like to think that we are all granted at least some modicum of remembrance. I like the wistfulness of this one. I don't
see anything I would change. ~ Geez.
.

Rosewood Apothecary

These futile words what can they mean?
Any fool can hope and dream,
Put pen to paper, easy to do.
But it takes a man to see dreams through.

Am I a Man? I sometimes wish
I could be more than shape and form,
What should I fear as darkness falls?
Soon night must come, and then, no more.

Not true, I shall be all I loved,
In them I live as memories,
As my bones in the grave decay as rust,
So I live on though my flesh be dust.

And you my love, My angel.
Fair as any that walked this earth.
Will you recall, when I am gone
those sweet, sweet times we spent alone?

Or will your memory of me fade?.
As lands eroded by creeping tides.
For death will have his way and I’m
afraid, you will forget.

Beautiful,
Tim

Alex Tanner

Thank you Tim. Your comments are greatly appreciated and I make adjustments to my work in the file on my pc. It is my intention, when I have sufficient completed works to find a local artist who can illustrate them and I will then publish, at my own expense if I must. I may have mentioned that several are very explicit and I shall title the compilation. 'Of Love and Lust'. In the meantime thank you once again for your interest and advice.
Alex

Lavender

Hello, Alex,
Wonderful title. Each stanza has beautiful language, but I believe the second stanza is so strong, it could be a poem in itself. The final line sums up the theme very well. Reflective poetry.
Thank you,
Lavender