Candlewitch

Dec 04, 2022

This poem is part of the contest:

Emotions In Seasons

(Read More...)

Emotions In Seasons: How I feel and my favorites

December finds me at my hearth
warm-faced, poking up the fire.
Sliding into my favorite chair
book in hand, new worlds inspired.

Outside, snow is softly falling,
accumulating a blanket of white
while I recline dreaming of good wishes,
candles lit on this Yule night.

January, the Sign of the Wolf
meeting with the full moon,
coming together in words and deeds
bring all aspects of life in tune.

Soon, March winds insistently rage
Mother Nature in her frosted gown
gives way to spring's zephyrs
floral scents breeze through my town.

Joys of June brings our anniversary
and celebration for the day of his birth.
Happiness floods this month of my redemption
vast wealth of his affection, not a dearth.

Finally comes the Autumn months, stillness reigns
gathering on All Hallows Eve, eventide of All Saint's Day.
Feelings of awe overcome me, in between night and day,
quiet observance in shadows, keeping the hounds at bey!

About This Poem

Last Few Words: the punctuation is for you, Geezer ;)

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Northwestern Wisconsin USA, USA

Favorite Poets: Edgar Allan Poe

This user supports Neopoet so it can be free to all

Comments

Dear cat

I thought you're doing great here with your perception of the four seasons and how do your emotions go from one to another. The contest asked for your emotions at your favorite one, but you were really successful to make us, the readers, feel like every season is special for you.
A winner entry indeed!
Best wishes dear and
thank you for sharing

dear Rula,

thank you for reading my little escape from everyday living/problems into what I feel in my heart and spirit. I appreciate your reading and response :) thank you so much for your time and attention.

*love ya, Cat

Although...

the meter gets rough here and there, I am appreciative of the story and the way you have gone through the moods and the seasons. Nice work. ~ Geez.
.

dear Geez,

I would deeply appreciate your thoughts on how to clean this up...I wrote from my heart and not my head...so if you have any suggestions, I would be both intrigued and grateful to entertain them.

* love & hugs, Cat

Beautiful!

Poetically energetic and powerful imagery " January the sign of the wolf"!

How wonderful is your eloquence, pouring into my voids, creativity overflowing and flourishing with sincerity and distinction. Very beautiful.
.

thank you, Jack,

I am always energized when I read your comments. you have a knack of making people happy! it is good to hear from you!

*love, Cat

Thoughts...

This is my feel of the ryhthm and meter here:

Add a comma after hand.
Delete the [with] and add a [d] to inspire,
the word is strong enough that the extra [d] won't affect it.

Leave off the [ly] on velvet or leave out the word velvet altogether,
Say lit instead of alight, and say most holy night or [on this Yule night].

[To bring] instead of bringing

Delete [me] the rest of the line is fine

Get rid of the [and] use a comma, stillness reigns

Gather on Allhallow's eve, eventide of All Saint's Day
Feelings of awe come over me, in separation of night and day
quiet observance in shadows, keeping the hounds at bey!

Thank you for the punctuation, it helped guide me here.

Title's good, the language is better, and the theme very nice.
As always, the suggestions are to use or not, it's your work!
I hope this helps. Good luck, ~ Geez.
.

dear Geez,

thank you for giving this poem a good glance over and offering suggestions. I agree with all of them and will employ them when I get on-line tomorrow.I'm out of energy (spoons)

*love, Cat

Much better...

you are getting the hang of rhyming, although you claim it not! ~ Geez.
.

Cats cannot copy and paste

but delete
OUTSIDE
it always snows outside
to me it appears redundant
but
velvet would or may be better .....
may c
all d best
Now I don't
Contest

dear lovedly,

I appreciate your assistance, but in this case, "outside" is an event. thank you, and *hugs, Cat

Superb

That’s a lot of ground to cover in 6 stanzas. As always you’ve got a pretty refined poem here. This one is really tight and flowing. A nice meandering dream through the seasons of your mind.

Love it
Tim

dear Tim,

thank you, but I cannot take all the credit, as Geezer helped a great deal in smoothing it out. thank you for reading this and commenting!

;) Cat

Oh he’s a great editor

As are you. I’ll forget that time you roasted me for starting lines with conjunctions, which I now think about every time I write and I look for it in other people’s writing as well.

dear Tim,

you have a much more gentle touch than I. you deliver your observations with thoughtfulness it is your nature. I deliver like a sledge hammer. I admire your tactful ways . I shall try to be more like you.

*hugs, Cat

I’m flattered

This particular poem is similar to my writing at least in rhythm and rhyme. I think it feels like home to me; the chambers of my psyche, if you take my meaning. Geezer is also similar in that way and like I said he’s good with helping out. I urge you to both continue to be unapologetically yourselves. I also do like to think I’ve got a trick or two I can teach through my writing.

Again, nice job. I really like this little story. I learned a lot about you from 24 lines.

Tim

Also correction to above comment

* I’ll (never) forget that time…about the conjunctions. It made me such a better writer instantly.

thank you so much...

for all you are and all you will learn to be...you are ours, now and we are your family! a rag-tag group of poets.

*H & L, Cat

What a wonderful story

I am really only fond of one season, the one that makes me look normal even if it is only for a couple of months! Great job!

thank you,

dear Carrie, you have made me smile.

*hugs, Cat

Dear Sis.

Thus is a wonderful poem, is winter your favourite season cosseting in the warmth of the cold months? I only ask because it was the only season with more than one stanza? I think your language use was on point. I can't see anything I'd change. I thoroughly enjoyed the read I would love to hibernate in the winter before a blazing fire, I love the feeling of nesting in the warm months maybe one day I'll get to experience that snowy isolation.

Brava!!!

Love you Sis xxx

my dearest jayne

yes it is when we have an operating fireplace. this year it is not so. we are waiting for repairs. the company near us is overbooked. I also love the Autumn moths leading up to Candlemas (a pagan/wiccan holiday.) thank you for reading this and responding. I love sharing things with you!

*love, Cat

Seeing as how...

you have completely changed the whole poem; I will assume that you weren't satisfied with what you had.
So, here are a few things that I thought would help. I would change 2nd line of stanza two, to read:

It accumulates a new blanket of white, or
Accumulating a blanket of white

[meeting] with the full moon?

Delete [thoughts]

bring[s]?

giv[ing] delete [as] from end of line

Delete [a] from line: vast wealth of his affection, [not] a dearth

Feelings of awe overcome me, in [between night and day]?

I think that it is just a matter of a little adjustment of meter
to make this great poem!

You know that these are just my suggestions, you can use or discard any or all.
P.S. thanks for the punctuation! LoL You CAN do it, but you decide if you really need it or not.
~ Geez.
.