I see my life as a collage
carefully placed memories stitched-
one by one
From the bible-
and the satanic handbook
written from neighbors below
i use a fingernail
and carve a fairy tale
Of a life once listened
in darkened youthful lounges,
where mother was a narrater-
least she be the villain
And father’s voice held the devil’s tone,
which suited him just fine
My collage made of skin and bone,
does speak a rightful line
Of sin’s I know,
The one’s I saw myself-
read and heard
and dutifully observed
I see my life as a collage
memories by a red hand
one by one
The mother of god hung
by light of the devil’s son
And my tale feel’s done.
Comments
Breathtaking.
Each verse ends with a line that hits you in the guts. Powerful. I’ve never read poetry that manages to be both beautiful and haunting, but still strikes home in its meaning.
Only criticism is that, personally, I feel like the last line doesn’t need to be repeated. I feel like the line is powerful enough. But that’s up to you, of course :)
thank you, we aim to hit (in
thank you, we aim to hit (in a non-physical sense) people in the guts. I agree, and will make the change to the last line now. I've looked at it for a minute, and repeating it doesn't have the same feeling as purely writing it once.