victor dyck
Oct 03, 2022

balance

must balance the linear world abstract thought with the biological and work education a scohesion makes better mind bodies and souls after or before work or school go jogging or a walk in a park
too much speculation especially with people that dont talk some could be true but strange
too much food no good or work or school

About This Poem

Last Few Words: i hope you agree

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I appreciate moderate constructive criticism

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: Massachusetts middlesex

Favorite Poets: shelly pope shakespeare dryden robert frost ee cummings t

More from this author

Comments

Lavender

Hi, Victor,
In your last few words, you've stated that you hope the reader agrees. I've read several of your pieces and usually can find your theme or intention, but not without intensely hunting for it due to the form you choose for your poetry. It's hard to know when one thought or sentence is complete. I'm hoping to enjoy more of your material, but find it challenging to read. A more conventional form would be wonderful!
Thank you,
L