Grunge;
the last act,
Obscene anthems:
Screams of rage and pain,
From the abused children
Of loggers and fishermen;
One more fucked up teenager on drugs;
This is truly a West Coast sound ...
When will the Old World listen
To what their children are saying?
But the only sound they hear
Is the soft swish of dollar bills falling
Into the hat passed round
As they count up the cash
Of fallen angels,
The night-time angels of tired streets
And decaying alleys
Oozing listless promises
Of run down sins
As though time
Had worn itself out
With its own emptiness ...
Is abuse something new?
Or did we keep silent so long
Because no one cared?
How many of these abused children
Will themselves become abusers?
Those of us who were silenced so long
Became environmentalists.
The falling eyes
Of the fallen children
Of this Old World,
Angels every one of us,
Turned to dust and ashes
In this Pointless Grey Place
Where no one cares
I see fallen angels
Everywhere
Vancouver, BC Fall 1994
Comments
Nice job
I grew up on grunge music amongst a lot of other stuff. It captures the melancholy of both the weather of the area and the subjects living there.
Here’s some suggestions
The night-time (cherubs) of tired streets
-you already say angel in the lines before and think “Cherub Rock”.-
How many of these (tortured) children
Will themselves become the (trauma)
Those of us who were silenced so long
Became environmentalists.
-Again eliminating redundancies-
The downcast eyes
Of disgraced and dishonored children
Of this Old World,
Angels every one of us,
Turned to ashes and dust
In this Pointless Grey Place
Where no one cares
I see fallen angels
Fallen angels, Everywhere
Hope I didn’t ruin anything. Obviously take them as gentle suggestions.
Nice work,
Tim
reply to reply
Thanks for you comments. They are thoughtful and considered. However, I use the idea of fallen angels to apply to the denizens of Vancouver's Downtown Eastside as my own personal descriptive. (I sometimes also refer to them as "lost ones", a term I borrowed from a novel published by Pulp Fiction whose title and author have long been forgotten, including by me, I'm sorry to say.) Cherubs implies fat, smiling babies in my mind, even though, in the original Jewish conception, they were probably nothing like how they have come to be viewed! Fallen angels are those angels who dared to rebel against what I prefer to think of as the omnipotent tyrant, and were cast into Hell, so there would also be a loss of meaning (at least, from my perspective), since most people in Vancouver regard the DES as a kind of Hell and do their best to avoid that particular zone of the city where these lost ones live (mostly because they have nowhere else to go). And I deliberately avoided punctuation the last five lines to confuse meaning (by making it less absolute).
Grunge
The anthem to my teenage years. You captured it's essence beautifully in this poem. Good job.
reply to reply
You're welcome. And now it's time to post the next one that a rather long poem I published on here a while ago refers back to. (Unfortunately, I've forgotten what it's called! I could never be an actor – I have been know to forget my own birthday, and have been trying since 1972 to memorise Poe's The Raven.)
The Raven
My favorite poem. I have yet to memorize it as well.
reply to reply
Aye, Poe is one of the few (perhaps the only) influence who made a lasting influence on me. There are probably others, but I'm buggered if I can say who they might be. The Raven and The Bells are two of the greatest poems ever written in my opinion.
And I looked to see what that poem that references all the ones I've been posting lately: Capsaicin Structure. (Capsaicin is the chemical in hot chilis that makes 'em hot. Unfortunately, I can't actually put the title on the poem, because it is a Lewis Diagramme of the molecule.)
Poe
Is my biggest influence. Besides him, I would have to say the likes of Jim Morrison and Lewis Carroll. The Raven is my favorite and I also enjoy Alone and Dream Within A Dream
reply to reply
There are loads of poets I like, but I would probably only cite Poe as an influence. The way he uses sound in The Bells has influenced my whole attitude to poetry and the story-telling qualities of The Raven appeal to me. I would love to use ee cummings as an influence, but any attempt to do what he does would only look like imitation! I do like to make up and compound words creatively, but that is something I came up with on my own. I love the Great War Poets and the three Ancient Greek Poets who invented Lyrical Poetry. But I mostly discovered these late in life.
The Raven
Did it for me. It appealed to my better nature and has been a constant source of inspiration and influence. I have raven wings tattooed on my shoulder with Nevermore written above them. There is always a little Raven in everything I do
COINING WORDS
I'm a creator
like LORD OF NATURE
you must mature faster
be thine own
A MAESTRO
real MASTER
Then the Lord may think to bless you
but then you wouldn't know
the zoo ring master
had already rung the bell
now you towards eternity only whistle
read my poetry on Vancouver slowly
1972 a small rat
informative promoting me as
e e cumming clap clap clap at that
don't forget Shakespeare in me
lords milord fun making extempore poetry pardon all earthly gods like me
milordzzzzzzzzz