Fight to Survive

The house is in an uproar!
It feels and hears the cries of the poor!
Endless cries of sorrow echoed;
From Mummy and children;
Sometimes silent, Sometimes loud!

Sometimes trapped beyond a voice;
Please “Daddy do not hit me again”
“You are hurting my skin”
Look! What seemed to be a mark;
Portrayed a purple colour;
Digs sharper than a knife or a bruise;
Cuts deeper than a wound;

Is there sun after the rain?
Is there a day after these nights?
Mummy struggled to stay alive;
And I struggled just to survive.

About This Poem

Last Few Words: Kindly share your comments and what needs to be improved. Thank you so much most appreciated.

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: South Zone

Favorite Poets: Maya Angelou

Comments

Dark poetry!

This piece depict physical abuse by your biological father. Why he did love toturing his children even leaving them with wounds on their body. Was he a military man? Why did he love beating his family without any iota of remorse? I still wonder if he was truly your real dad or was he a foster father? What actually prompted his wickedness against you all?

Do you normally often come late in the night? What are your weaknesses that often triggers his punishments against you all?

Hi Jackweb, in this piece my

Hi Jackweb, in this piece my father was not a military man. This is my biological father. The beatings were real, raw and left bruises. Why did he punish his kids like this? I do not know as the closure was never met. I have healed and I can now write and share my story, without a teary eye or wounded soul. There are many silent victims that can resonate and identify through my writings. Maybe my father did not have a happy childhood, maybe all he knew and experienced was barbaric punishment, or maybe he did not want girl children but only boys as he showed no remorse for his actions. For me to say the reason why will be known in my other poems. Thanks for the concerns.

Always sending healing

Thanks for being so vulnerable and sharing. I was wondering (and feel free to withhold if this is an overreach), are we reading these in the order you’ve written them, oldest to most recent?
I ask because I’m seeing a very quick evolution in your writing style. It’s just a curious observation.

Great work
Tim

Hi Tim, these poems were only

Hi Tim, these poems were only penned this year of my childhood life experiences inclusive of a mixture of domestic violence during my marriage which ended years ago. Other poems are factual experiences of persons' cases and the reality of such trauma.

Presently, I am free and am becoming the person I am evolving too. I am not a victim but a survivor for quite some years now. Not sure what you mean by a quick evolution?

Thanks so much for sending healing as my healing journey is never completed, it is an ongoing process but my writing heals my soul to explore my thoughts. Hope this answers your question. I would say out of my vulnerability comes my strength and indomitable will.

Tim thanks for highlighting

Tim thanks for highlighting my great work, but I have a far way to go yet in learning and improving the many styles of poetry.

dear Warrior Poet,

oh my god!
a very poignant write...so striking! I can only imagine the pain of it all... I can see the eyes hungry for cessation and grief and disbelief. I like these lines: