My heart

you were my dējàvu
I was your gladiolus
on a pashmina my dreams were wooven
wishing we could have a pas de deux

rapidly I feel my pleura plunge
then I retreat to plodding
and I surmise
it must be my malevolence in encumbrance

am I displaying bigotry
or stoicism
confusion as the order of the day
I cut my coat giving my heart a second coat

whatever the case may be
I conced
my heart is now chargē dàf-faires
now am back to the drawing board

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Direction: How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft

Region, Country: Nigeria, NGA

Favorite Poets: Alfred Tennyson

It seems to me that you are using what you feel are "odd" and "little known" words withy which you are not very familiar. But I could be mistaken.

"chargē dàf-faires" I fear is totally wrong. It's "charge d'affaires".

I hope you are not offended by my comments.

Thanks for the awareness