scribbler
Dec 09, 2021

BLUE RIDGE ECHOES

Daylight broke an hour ago
quickly through a cloudy sky
here where ancient oak trees grow.
I sit as time and life goes by.

Alone suits me on this day.
Not even traffic noise comes here
on this morn that's still and gray
as geese fly by I wait on deer.

A puff of breeze... a blizzard starts
of brown and tan water oak leaves.
I watch as each one twirls and darts
some ticking off of my coat sleeves.

And all the while in these blue hills
it seems the old ones haunt this place
as mists rise from steep hollows' rills
then disappear without a trace.

While far below whitewaters flow
with riffles and pools here and there
where brook trout and stump knockers grow
and the scent of mosses tint the air.

Ridges march toward the northwest
then fade into the heavy air
which I inhale deeply into my chest.
I close my eyes without a care.

...I startle awake...what did I hear?
The shadows have now become long.
Was it a fading Cherokee flute soft and near
from a long lost forgotten year
or just some kind of wild bird's song?

But the sun is getting low
so I arise and quietly go..

About This Poem

Style/Type: Structured: Western

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: South Carolina, United States, USA

Favorite Poets: Frost

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Comments

lovedly

good next poems book scribble on I shall read

S

I have had problems completing a poem lately but maybe my dry spell is coming to an end. Good of you to drop by

Geezer

you lead me on a trip through forest and down paths that I have never trod but feel like I know from reading your works.
I love the descriptions of the breezes blowing through the woods and the smells they bring to the reader. The little bobbles I find in the rhythm, don't matter much in the telling of the story. As you know, I can't get out in the woods to have these little adventures anymore, so when you tickle my memories and they respond, I'm pleasantly pleased. Thank you. ~ Geez.
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Gracy

Gracy

3 years 4 months ago

What a lovely poem, I thoroughly enjoyed reading it. I shall return to get the full implications of some lines, as I don't know "the territory", so to speak, Gracy

Triskelion

This poem is really nice.
Only a few crits. S2,L4 you can add "by" after fly and the meter is better
S5,L4 "ant" should be and?
S6,L1 does "Ridges march northwesterly" work there?

Overall, one of my favourites here.

Thomas

Jackweb

Scribbler poetic mastery is amazing. I enjoyed the rythm, the pattern and cadence of words implored in the stanzas.
Each line is strongly connected and it maintained the inflow of thought.
Great piece indeed!

'Blue Ridge Echoes' is sweet as gum!