Enter and Exit As You Please

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GLASS PRISON

I have the choice of two windows
from which to look upon the world.
Each one reveals different shows
when, slowly, every day's unfurled.

One overlooks dense hoary oaks
where wood peckers and squirrels play.
Their constant solemn shade invokes
that all who visit come to stay.

The other commands a vista view
of tidy farms and wooded hills.
A sight that insists I imbue
my wanderlust for new seen thrills.

But it matters not for each window
invites me to a land forbidden me.
Places where I Used to go
when I was still young and free.

Now I'm bound to halls and a small room
and this infernal rolling chair
feeling I've already met my doom.
One day I'll pass through the glass and go out there.

About This Poem

Style/Type: Structured: Western

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: South Carolina, United States, USA

Favorite Poets: Frost

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Comments

Hi Ted

Yes this is a contest poem. Kinda doubt it will win but I got to thinking about windows and how two windows in the same room can have such different views and this spilled out. and we will ALL escape to another place on a certain day

Hello Thalassa

Welcome to the asylum lol. I am pleased you like this poem enough to give such in depth critique. I Will give each suggestion serious consideration when I do my first edit which will likely be in a week or so. I'll let this scribble gather some more ideas first.

Dear Alan, this is a lovely

Dear Alan, this is a lovely poem and is sure to win the contest. I was reading Thalassa's critique and learned a lot from her, so thank you T, if you see this.
The idea of two windows with different views is surprising, I'd not have thought of that. But you live in beautiful surroundings, so I understand.
I'll return for another read when you've done some tweaking, we had a power outage and it's gotten very late for me.
All the best, Gracy

Hi Gracy

I assume the Alan is a late night typo lol.I had thought about extending the two different views thing but figured it might make the poem too long and lord know most of my stuff is pretty long already. I'll likely do first edit over the week end. Thanks for dropping by

Hey old buddy...

You now have another person who will ride your butt about metere and take you to task for your wonderful works! I feel like I can relax a little and just ride her coatails for a little. LoL Seriously, if her exhaustive review means that she likes it that much, you should finally get over calling your work "Scribblings". Sic 'em Thalassa! ~ Gee.
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