From Apo to Area 1
that unfaithful morning,
six passengers sitting in an old taxi cab,
A gentle aged man at my left,
A Pastor at my right,
A middle aged Yoruba woman in the other side of my right.
Green white green turning into brown and grey,
With so much fragrance of dust and weird interior
Angry naked seat irons, after a long grunts comes takeoff
One cannot even think of whining the windows with bare-hands
A miracle that only the driver can perform
A wretched cab forced beyond its capacity
The aged man asked
why do you carry six
the Hausa driver turned his neck
Oga are you new in this country? he said,
I would have laughed ahhh, but no
but the petrol price is down, why do you still carry six?
the Hausa man looked at him and hissed.
Sometimes i pay for a seat
so that everybody will be comfortable
I replied the old man
then he smiled, its alright.
We suffer and smile
Along the road
bumps and dust is inevitable
everyone packed like sardine
inside the wretched cab
coupled with the unending phone calls of the Yoruba woman
drop me, drop me,
before this gura-gura injures me she said.
A great sigh of relief,
for those at the back seat
An everyday episode
Now a tradition
Nigeria we suffer and smile.
Comments
You didn't need...
to delete the whole poem and then re-write it, now you have lost all the comments from before. I do like what you have done with it, but you still have a few little things to adjust. It's not whining; the word you are looking for is: winding. You need an [s] on the end of sardine[s]. You have done very well in rewriting and it makes one proud that you have takenm the advice that has been given to you from the readers. Good job! ~ Geezer.
.
Hi
nigeria. I can't say that this describes your country as I've never even been on the continent. But It does carry a feeling that is easily interpreted.......stan