( Brazened truth is like
awakening of Lord Buddha
when enlightenment came his way
tonight it came to me
awareness comes from within)
Brazened Truth
dream not of me
in the twilight of darkness
as I step into the forest
of unknown long shadows
as I step inside
don't follow me
ere the shadows envelop
the followers like you be
and as in the stars
a moonlit night
the shadows lengthen
let darkness see its final end
move on into the inner stretches
unknown
in the eerie night
the sounds of wild
shake me not in fear
of who is what
as the walk of loneliness
I pursue
into the early dawn too
as sun rays play
hide and seek
between rustling leaves
stay far behind
lest in the shadows still long enough
you too fall into the brazened darkness
as the sun winds its way through
from erring twilight
to early dawn
my life does also ensue
and I emerge as enlightened
still as a sacred Eastern bamboo
Amen
Comments
thanks
well judged
each poet has to evolve himself
and understand a poem in his /one's own way
you have expressed well after a second read and knowing about
LORD BUDDHA you will find a newer imagination of this very poem
you are young and of the latest generation we are old outgoing with our ancient vision
Dear DH
poetry and mystiscm
It is often attempted and certainly hard to pull of the sense of a divine state or a mystical dream.
I'm not sure the poem needs a narrative. But for the sake of poetry when attempting such a work I would try to avoid cliche images often associated with the zen moment, like the darkness and light...maybe something more personal.
Keep the meter: "you fall into the brazened darkness of ignorance" . I would cut "of ignorance" because brazened darkness says enough, and the added syllables are unnecessary.
"and I emerge as the enlightened one
still erect as a sacred bamboo"
I think perhaps you feel enlightened, not the (THE) enlightened one, you are the mystic who has transcended. The last image is also for me a distraction.. I'm unfamiliar with sacred bamboo, and if I am most others will be, even if it is so called somewhere. And erect is just to phallic.
But I do appreciate the attempt and sentiment.. Just the need to write it still connects you to the world, to the relationship you wish to share between you and others, which is outside of the purist
union between men and the divine energy. A poet first, a mystic second.
I surely appreciate your analysis so deep
Eumol Sir
This poem I composed in the thickest of BAMBOO forests
in the far EAST (VIETNAM) Years ago
As I was clearing my poetic archives I came across this, which was liked by at least 1130 poets. So I shared it here
Bamboo is just a straight pole
may be erect 'phallic'' as you say
But will think of how to it replace it
as also stan does say
let me think (wink)
Hi loved
I have no idea what an enlightened bamboo is but I really like the rest of this
HIGH STAN
Did you re read my amended one
any suggestions
hands up scribbler
lol
A VERY HAPPY VALENTINE ......to all neos
Why Bamboo is sacred
Yes bamboo is sacred.
If you become hollow and empty through meditation
like the hollow bamboo
you will be enlightened
Bamboo stands for music
emptiness
Bamboo stands for our inner body too.
As Rabindranath Tagore Poet Laureate, said in Song offering No 1...
This little flute of a reed
thou hast carried over hills and dales
and hast breathed through it
melodies eternally new
Hence sufficient justification for
SACRED BAMBOO