purple-hobbit
purple-hobbit
Jan 10, 2019

Sleepy Mornings

I awake with borrowed time from snoozed alarms,
Duvet awry and sheet entangled with arms.
Each pillow I throw with contempt at the floor
bitterly wishing that I could have slept more.

Zombie-like I rise from my tomb of a bed
with a nest of a bun askew on my head
and wiping my eyes with the back of my hand
I vault out of bed trying my best to stand.

And I do, for a minute, ‘till my knees crumple;
I lay on the floor with pyjamas all rumpled.
With pillows on the floor, I’m tempted by rest,
but I pull myself up and start to get dressed.

With my wardrobe wide open and clothes, all strewn,
I dig through the piles pervading my room.
After some time, a top and trousers are found
amassed from the various heaps on the ground.

Makeup applied with shaky hands weary,
eye’s uncovered bags making them bleary.
Hair and teeth brushed and face glitter adorned
I stuff my bag full whilst stifling yawns.

Every morning I do the same;
Wake up and want to sleep again
While at night I sit and postulate
Why can’t humans hibernate?

About This Poem

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: United Kingdom, GBR

Favorite Poets: Philip Larkin

More from this author

Comments

Roscoe Lane

Good and for obvious reasons I couldn't help thinking of my granddaughter, who always appeared half asleep in the morning. But I believe if you removed a couple of words here and there. for example just say - wiping my eyes with the back of my hand. or- a nest of a bun askew on my head. It would feel better to me. Love Roscoe.

purple-hobbit

Mornings are very hard for us young people lol, I know it doesn't read quite right but I made most lines have the same amount of sylables so I might have to switch a few more lines up! Thanks for reading ! :)

R

raj

6 years 3 months ago

You have pretty well painted a picture with words of a sleepy girl and in the end given it a touch of humor...
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weirdelf

But the poem is unnecessary. Throw out the alarm clock and threaten physical harm to anyone who wakes you before you want.
Works for me.

But seriously I get that there is more to this than meets the eye at first. Just why the fuck is our society such that it is a gruelling task instead of a delight to greet each new day?

purple-hobbit

Unfortunately with 9am lectures I can't chuck away my alarm lol, I agree it's a shame we can't wake naturally especially as our brains only really start to work past 10AM. On weekends on the other hand I spring out of bed!
Thanks for reading!