zebra
zebra
Dec 06, 2018

Same Blood

same blood
different bodies

same air
different lungs

same truth
violent contradictions

About This Poem

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Country/Region: Florance MA USA

Favorite Poets: Plath

More from this author

Comments

Rula

Rula

6 years 4 months ago

First time to meet so let me welcome you.
A succinct eloquent writing.
I however would modify the title as "Same and yet different"
Just my humble opinion.
Thank you for sharing!

zebra

Really great to meet you and thanks for taking the time to read my poem
I shall contemplate your suggestion
;)

Eumolpus

I might suggest "same blood type" as opposed to same blood, which makes it sound like what it suggests, sharing the same blood like in transfusion.

But in a short work like this you have said a lot. Truth is truth, we share the same truths, but we sure don't interpret them the same!
Well conceived!

zebra

zebra

6 years 4 months ago

Thanks for your comment and compliment Mark …..Very appreciated
Same blood evoked family i.e. family of man; all of us human ;)

IRiz

IRiz

6 years 4 months ago

Ha!
You wrote another great poem.
You achiving here a tone that makes your reader feel that you talk directly to him/her.
That goes to Instagram post when I am back to my desktop.