raj
Jun 30, 2018

Mouthwash [Sunku]

sun sets
erasing
lurking silhouettes

shows up
announcing
new beginning

time to
rinse foul smells
of yesterday

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: Somewhere in the world, IND

More from this author

Comments

Rula

Rula

6 years 10 months ago

A special last stanza.
An uplifting little gem.
Thank you for sharing.

R

raj

6 years 10 months ago

Thanks Rula for stopping by to read. Good to know you liked it...

i was contemplating to change first line of last stanza like this

dew drops
rinse foul smells
of yesterday

but then thought that it would not make the reader think which is part of the requirement of aesthetics of Sunku [ meaning there should be a hidden message]
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