Ode To The Cellphone [March contest]

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My groan on Phone's

I was just in the toilet checking my Poo
As at my age this is what you should do
Damn phone fell down the loo.

Wrapped it in rice that was very nice
Until the whole lot went into the oven
The Mrs thought I was helping make a pudding

Phone you were supposed to be smart
Trouble and strife thought it was nice
That I started to make a pudding with rice.

Today I took it to have a new glass put in,
I should have put the damn thing in the bin,
Seventy pounds it cost me this afternoon.

I saw the time shine on its new unscratched face
Put it in my shirt pocket which is its usual place
Now I had to rush before the post office closed.

As I reached the car that wasn’t too far
I dropped my keys on the road in my haste
The phone fell out and took their place

I picked both up with tears in my eyes
A sharp piece of gravel I had spied
Sticking out of the glass of my phone

I started the car and continued to my home
Let the driver’s window down all the way
Threw the bloody thing away, so don’t call me.

About This Poem

Last Few Words: It's an age thing, lol

Style/Type: Structured: Western

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - draft

About the Author

Region, Country: UK, GBR

Favorite Poets: Wordsworth

This user supports Neopoet so it can be free to all

Comments

I know how...

you feel. Damn near chucked mine out of the window myself a couple of days ago.
I laughed when I felt it was appropriate and cried at the end. ~ Gee.
.

Many thanks for your visit, I haven't had any problems as yet I have a pay as you go phone. Its battery is always Flat as I don't bother using it much. lol
Hope you are all OK out there after all the things and people journeying on this last year I feel more of a need to know of you all..
Take care of you and yours,
As always, Ian, and the children..

have to admit

the first Stanza caught my attention.
Poem was very clever. Thanks.

Emo

Didn't you know that if you are old the best thing you can do is check your Poo lol..
Thanks for the visit enjoy the company,
Yours Ian..

Lots of fun

here dear Ian though I know what trouble these phones cause (and they think they're smart ha?)

Best wishes.

Dear Rula

It is lovely to have you here again it has been a little lonely and I don't mean the Neopoet one.
Hope the theme wasn't too crude for you. lol
Take care young Lady talk soon I hope,
Yours as always Ian ..xx

Thank you Mark

Good to see you here, My phone sits in a drawer battery flat and out of funds, to me they are not much use, but I belong to the Curmudgeons brigade, A grumpy old mans place, so I can berate as much as possible lol..
Take care out there and I am glad it made you smile a bit,
Yours Ian..

Ian

Lots of humor packed in this poem blended with realism

Regards...

Thank you Raj

Your visit is most welcome.
Hope everything is OK with you.
Take care and know we see you there,
Yours Ian..