“I feel quite down.”
My best friend said wearing a frown
So I fixed up a coffee cup
Then I told him “ try to feel up!”
Jan 05, 2018
Feel Up
About This Poem
Last Few Words: I got the idea for this poem form shel Silverstein’s falling up.
Review Request Direction:
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft
Comments
Bastard!
Telling a person who is feeling down is like telling someone to grow back a leg.
Unless it was a lewd suggestion [grins]
Then again perhaps there is something zen here.
Did you sit quietly before him, patiently repairing a broken cup, in the process enhancing its beauty with its flaws?
Of course
it's lewd...that's why it's good/funny lol