Departure haunts
sad piercing
but beautiful
you give life to a memory
that could have created a history
now alone you face the tragedy
it's will of Almighty
nothing can amend it
Now let go the past
live on a new life at last
for you shall never again
from here pass
keep the past
as a flavor that was not ever cast
So move on to another path
forget pain and wrath
Have mercy on him
let peace now
Time alone to you bring
Let it go by
nothing really can anyone do
passed
is past
Comments
Some thoughts
There are many things I like about this very different work. I have no problem with breaking all the rules with on/off rhymes and the form of rhyming you have chosen. I would prefer consistency in punctuation though. Whereas a composer can fill the measure with any notes he wants to, he must only conform to the time signature. I think poetry shares a similar rule with punctuation, that is, if you use it all. If not punctuated, I prefer none to some.
As a poetry based therapist/healer I deal with grief and getting people to use poetry as a force of healing. How hard it is for people to grieve, and get over supreme sorrow. The poem to me is more about you, that you so want the sadness to be transcended from this person so that person can be reborn to happiness. Ultimately I have found that when I react with both silence and just acknowledgement of the grief does help those in trauma. I so wish for them they could "let it go".
So I understand your poem and its sincerity.
I enjoy that the poem is concise and focused. However, personally not sure of the title. It has a touch of irony or satire not found in the body.
thank you so much sir
as for title I could not think for her
however shall apply my mind tomorrow
GN
Punctuation s I often leave to guy's reading it
as to their breath
Nice poem, nice delivery of
Nice poem, nice delivery of emotions too. But I agree with Eumolpus concerning the punctuations.
thank you new friends
shall look into
today
Hurting pasts are better of
Hurting pasts are better off forgotten and focus placed on the future. A nice piece Lovedly, enjoyed reading it, and thanks for sharing.
Well glad I am
you appreciate poetry
all is mostly imagery
we all know it
and shall always create
some more similar ones
not only about sadness
but not gloom alone
also of happiness
we all need to survive today
to face a tomorrow
which will come our way
as another today
so be happy poetry
is just an emotion
we pass our time mainly
and we entertain mostly
autumn has now set in
it soon will be history
the snow are in higher clouds
they soon will fall
then you will say
if winter comes
will summer be far away
no ,not all
will meet once again
after this fall.