it was starting to rain on the night that we first decided
a choice to visit a nearby cemetery with friend
sadly a few attended
there was a crypt in a center of the grounds
Darkened black tombstones all around us
you could hear a pin drop
we brought along much alcohol to quench our taste
through the duration of our time spent we stared into space
we were just night people looking for some fun
Suddenly a hush of silence filtered through our conversation,
A creepy figure appeared in front of us with eyes of fire
we all screamed and vanished quickly into the night
a black cat was spotted that sent quite a fright
the stranger was non other then a bag man named Frank
he wanted a sip or to cause he knew that we drank
yet the party was over and back to are homes we would go
Later on that evening I heard a knock on the door
as I slowly opened there was no one there to be found
in my despair it occurred to me I had nothing to wear
Bare ass naked I would search around yet nothing to be found
the night can sent quite a fright
creatures of habit in their ceremonial way
Quench the desire the fate of a care,
never again will I be so kind to a graveyard hermit that robbed me blind....
Comments
My suggestion is to proofread your work.
It is a good poem, but typographical errors distract. Examples:
through the duration of our time spent we starred into space (Stared is the correct spelling).
Suddenly a hush of silence filtered through are conversation (Our should be used instead of Are).
Do you see my meaning? Just a suggestion to help.
The poem is good and deserves to be written with more care. I try never to allow anything to be posted that isn't EXACTLY what I intended.