The past few years I've come to see,
first high up and far away,
a lone crow circling over me.
I glimpse him at least every day.
As time goes by he becomes nearer
and his caws become imperative.
I think his motive is now clearer
he's waiting till I cease to live.
So SHOO! old crow don't shadow me!
or at least don't fly so close.
There too much more I want to be
before it is my time to go.
But until then I'll just keep on
and try to avoid some lethal hazard
and recall each coming dawn
better a crow than circling buzzard
Comments
Stan
I loved this one, it brings back the old beliefs we held way back, they were that if a crow was seen on a house for three days there was going to be a death there.
Strange as it may seem when I was here in Leicester and worked in the city I had to catch a bus each day, opposite the bus stop one week for three days a crow was on the bungalow opposite, A few weeks later I asked of the people there to a person that also took the bus and they said that one of the people had died there that week so how true is this old saying and have you the same sort of folk lore??
Hope all is well with you and the crow has gone lol,
Yours as always Ian..
Hi Ian
Sometimes the crow seems a lot closer than others lol. Appreciate the visit.......stan
I like this one Stan
Though serious must be the message to the crow, it isn't without a sense of humor.
Enjoyable as always.
Hi Rula
Better to have a crow hovering that a buzzard I guess lol. Always nice to see you've come by......stan
Stan
you have penned (inadvertently?) a pretty cool aphorism: " better to have a crow hovering than a buzzard!"
That now will forever feel like part of the poem to me.
As to the poem itself:
thematically, great
execution, good
length, excellent
regards,
LOL
Got 2 birds. One wants the flesh and the other awaits the soul........Do you think it would improve the poem to include this?
definitely!
definitely!
of course, you'll have to do the work....I just judge (lol)
I like the theme, just think it could use a little drama
buzzards are icons of direness/death (flesh snatchers)
crows have a certain mystery/mystique about them (soul catchers)
good luck
Hi
I value your opinion and will see what I can do about expanding this a bit. Might take a while because things are very hectic with me right now.......stan