Wished you'd read the expressions,
heard the sighs and deeper moans;
felt the surge and spasms
of ecstatic waves
teasing the shores
instead
you were consumed
by the tidal wave of lust
crashing the shores
in a momentary illusion of ecstasy
wetting the shores with a frothy mess
Comments
Hello Raj
Could "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" be another possible title? However, I admit it is a longish one.
Loved the comparison and of course the word craft is a top one!
Kudos!!
thanks Rula for stopping by
thanks Rula for stopping by and your comment...yes the title proposed by you is a bit longish...my attempt has been to show the contrast in perceptions....not sure if that has been achieved...
Regards,
of course
The suggested title was just a way to tell you that I got the "contast in perception". I liked the "beauty" part of the title but thought thought the second part a bit irrelevant, but see what others might think.
of course
The suggested title was just a way to tell you that I got the "contast in perception". I liked the "beauty" part of the title but thought thought the second part a bit irrelevant, but see what others might think.
i think the second stanza is
i think the second stanza is relevant since it shows the contrasts between the beauty and the beast...
Regards,
sorry
for the misunderstanding. I wasn't clear enough in my I was talking about the second part of the title, but of course you're right.
Sex
and making love...difference clearly, succinctly defined here. 1st line, maybe "Wish you'd read the expressions."?.......stan
Thanks Stan for finding time
Thanks Stan for finding time to read and comment in spite of your ailment which makes it tough for you to type. You are spot on with the theme as too the change in first line which in fact i had been contemplating but will now do write away....
Best regards and thanks again,
i whole-heartedly...
agree with both Stan and Rula. Excellent work here. Just think that you could have, should have used [wish] that you [had] read the expressions. ~ Gee
Thank you Gee for your time,
Thank you Gee for your time, read and comment. You and Stan are right about the change in the first line, which as you can see I have done now..
Regards,
last night I read this
with a completely different view. Now I see how does the title fit.
Truly appreciate your
Truly appreciate your returning to this page again Rula. Happy to know that you could now connect with the them and find the title appropriate...
Regards,
raj
Great contrast and I think that you are beginning to write outside of your secure being.
This will bring with it a few errors but the end product f your poetry will be worth it..
Great work good to see you out here,
this is what Neopoet is about..
Yours, Ian..
Thanks Ian for your time,
Thanks Ian for your time, read and encouraging comment.
Regards,
hi raj
this is well written. Thanks for sharing.
Alid
Thanks Alid for your time,
Thanks Alid for your time, read and comment.
Regards,