Too many roads for miles around
pass by places steep and wild
where in my youth I might be found.
Back then these hills seemed tame and mild.
Sometimes I'll stop at such a place
and think of times I spent in there
back when I had a strong sure pace
and young legs took me everywhere.
On That steep ridge long years ago
as dusk defeated a long day
an owl's flaring dive startled me so
I decided to be on my way.
Or a beaver swamp, another place,
a mile hike through hot woods and marsh
blue cranes would glide with quiet grace
above a land lovely yet harsh.
The mountain river underneath this bridge
rushing through the valley, steep.
I'd ford rapids below a craggy ridge
where now I only dare to peep.
Now I just sigh with memories
of places I'll not go again
where wildness haunts the evening breeze
on lands which never see old men.
But there are still some tamer lands
where I can walk with my old staff
through fairly level hardwood stands
where squirrels scold and far loons laugh.
So I'll forsake my former stomping grounds
resigned with what I've become now
a man whose once wild heart still pounds
and still stumbles through the woods...for now.
Comments
Re work
Like this poem very much..
"Of many roads the miles around,
I've passed these places
steep and wild
When in my youth I may be found
Back then these hills were tame
and mild
And Times I return to this place
visit the spots I know in there
upon young legs
with sure strong pace
had taken me most everywhere"
I see in writing it in my style
it greatly changes what you
have...Your voice of your tale
isnt this voice..
How your phrase and word use
But I like a challenge of it
the reworking
You have a keen eye for the
woods my friend...I venture in
our little nearby ridge trails
nothing large...I like how you
express it all
Just stopping by I
appreciated this much
and I agree at my age of
fifty I feel the difference
from being the early teens
to early twenties!
Thank You!
greetings
Sorry for late reply. i was called out of town for a few days unexpectedly. I have been lucky enough to have started tagging along hunting with father and relative when about 5 years of age. I now know that a lot of people have never experienced the many things dealing with nature which i take for granted. Hence I use poetry a lot to pass my memories of almost 55 years in the forests of the south east. You are always welcome to "rewrite" any poem of mine. I might well use an idea or two of your as I slowly revise a poem over the years, after all a lot of time just one right word can make a huge difference......stan
Inclusion
at the end of mild..
I re read and added
"And I was headstrong
sure and wild"
I can picture the bards of old
working songs to travel
medieval
woody guthrie in the mine
towns etc...
ah dont mind me
Tis a fierce winter eve'
taking a spell inside
reading
Thank You!
Hey Esker
ME?? headstrong? lmao. Sometimes i leave headstrong in the dust......stan
Really enjoyed this, Stan
You have honed you craft and genre to a fine degree.
A couple of minor things-
Sometimes I'll pull off at such place
doesn't scan well
such a place
helps yet somehow it still feels a bit awkward.
resigned with what I've become now
perhaps
resigned to what I've become now
Jess
I haven't been too pleased with the pull off at some place since I first wrote it. But like always, I'll keep returning to this and hopefully I'll think up a better way of saying what I want to convey there. the resigned line is one I thought was OK but I'm aware that I often unintentionally use poetic voice to make a line work so thanks for pointing this line out. And thanks for dropping by......stan PS Having been forced to get a new computer I now have equipment capable of spoken word as well as Skype and other stuff. Now I gotta teach myself how lol
Stan
To look and remember is fine.
Now I redirect my seeing, in the summertime as the flowers bloom.
I go touch them with my hands as a journey.
Then touch them with my mind as a place of rest, Then the cherry is to smell them, and make them a part of me as I stumble along..
A great write as usual, we must go hug a tree, Yours Ian.T
Hi
Be careful to not hug some type thorn tree lol. Seasons Do seem to change people's perspective don't they? As does the ending and beginning of a year. BTW your book arrived Thursday and I've leafed through it and read a few poems which have given me some insights to other ways to convey stuff. I appreciate the gift......stan
Stan
I am glad that the book is useful, it is a pity I cannot send some of the ones I have, or would like you to have, but maybe later.
Your writing is of a high standard and to glean something from that well used book makes me happy,
Yours Ian
When
One uses a big enough bore shotgun one is bound to get a hit some times lol. I hope to get your prize headed your way this week......stan
yep!
I very much like the imagery of this! Makes me want to come see for myself. It sounds soooo peaceful and invigorating!
Another great poem Stan :-)
Love Mand xxxx
Hi Mandy
If you were to ever manage to haul yourself over to this neck of the woods I'd be very much pleased to show you some of the places a lot of my stuff describes. In the mean time, I'm content to have you stroll beside me as I pass along some experiences and places in my scribbles.......stan
good revisions, Stan
good revisions, Stan
Thanks Jess
I seldom consider any poem of mine truly finished. Thus my continual gradual reviewing of almost all of them..........stan