How could you not forgive me?
My heart was laid bare to your eyes
Then you shook my dreams asunder
Making nightmares of their plan.
Now you need me to forgive you
That you have returned tail between legs
It should never have been, this love song
Where you wrote the words to suit your ways
We must now drift as gossamer strands
That they in their flight will hold a purpose
I feel we should rebuild another life
Outside of our touch of fraught feelings
Even if I am not at fault, I shall ask forgiveness
It will sweep my pathway clean, to restart
I shall remember your ways as they etched my soul
Now let me live in my peace as on I go.
Comments
A good way
if we can do it and easily forgive and forget. I am afraid it is not always as easy as that, but sometimes we must overcome the feelings of hatred and let it go, sometimes it is a bit harder, but still, life goes.
Thanks for sharing this Ian, this is a piece that all should read, I believe.
Rula
Many thanks for your visit, as you know most of my writings are fiction as is this one but it is another mind exercise.
I wonder should I reach out with the truth one day ??
Maybe not as to write fiction you can never be in the wrong, only the truth would put you in a real place where you have to be a true spirit..
I think we could run a workshop where we only write truth poems lol.
Go well young lady, and enjoy all the gifts you have gathered..
Yours Ian.T
sorry,duplicated
.
Hi
Much easier to forgive than to forget. Got 2 suggestions:
S-1, L-3 that word "shift" seems a bit gentle to me . Try shook and see if you like it better
last stanza L-4 try deleting "will"
Enjoyed the read............stan
Stan
Just a bit of story telling here, thanks very much for your two edits, they were needed and have now been put in the poem.
You two have a lovely day out there where the whippoorwill calls your name, Yours Ian.T