The paint flew in heliotrope
splashes
wet splurge
On canvas
on rooftop
on studio floor
speckled sprayed smeared
a fist of vermillion
POW!
a gloved chartreuse
azure was tender
THUMP!
The punches for real
all pent up fury
and poverty
The gallery needed action
the artists needed cash
so spectacled
ridiculed
a school of performing
paintbrush limbs
Round one to freedom
of expression
Round two to selling
canvas cash
Round three to jealousy
and status
Round four to artisan
hiatus
A draw for draws
of rainbow creatives
grappling their flaws
Now Emperors New Clothes
Fakes exposed!
Comments
this reads
as surrealism with wonderful colors and a subtle message.
I really thought this is creative.
No suggestions at the moment I can think of.
Thanks for sharing.
Ells'
You still got it my friend I don't know what your worrying about, its been quiet around here the last few days so I wouldn't stress too much if things take a while to be read, I found a poem of Eskers the other week and was dumbfounded that it had gone days and no one had read it, amazing
I really loved the movement in this poem and it has great imagery hun Beautiful work (as always) ;)
love and hugs JC xxx
The first line kind of tongue
The first line kind of tongue twisted me. I feel like it does a nice job of drawing the reader in, but it doesn't necessarily fit the flow of the remaining poem.
Color is fine in poetry, but color without image is sometimes just color. I would have liked to see a little more definition to "a gloved chartreuse/azure was tender".
The next comment is just about effect. The numbers one - four. Perhaps changing the visual by using one, 2, III, etc. may add something. May not.
Really liked the poem. Feel like there is something special lurking underneath that could be drawn out a little more. Make the POW knock me out.
Scott
Subtlety is profound in this
Subtlety is profound in this write as Rula has pointed out before me. There are many good ones but i liked this more than the rest for imagery & flow
Round one to freedom
of expression
Round two to selling
canvas cash
Round three to jealousy
and status
Round four to artisan
hiatus
Regards,