A summer eve
a baseball game
a girl who didn't
know my name
A nervous boy
made a call
to she who soon
became my all
Years of sharing
stars above
turned mere passion
into true love
Marriage and kids
soon raised and gone
a single soul
that I lean on
Years like pages
in a long book
I see that young girl
each time I look
*for Susan after 38 years
Comments
Hi Stan
Its wonderful shes your muse. Your lucky to have such a wife to give you visions. Shes your Aisling
John
Many years to come
Simple words but full of love ..Congratulations for both of you!!
simple and lovely
may you have another 38 and more stan
love judy
xxx
hi Dalton
You are right about my being lucky.............stan
hi Eph
No matter how long I gaze, I'll always see that young girl I saw that night............stan
hi Rula
Thank you very much.............stan
Hello Judy
I hope she can put up with me One more year much less 38 lol............stan
Just a bit of scansion, if I may suggest
A nervous boy
made a call
to she who soon
became my all
Years of sharing
stars above
turned mere passion
into love
phone is not necessary, true is a loss, but hear how it scans better?
Oh wait, I forgot, you don't speak English, you speak South Carolinan
Hi Jess
Kind of amazing that though I speak Carolina southern and you speak Australian we still both can read English lol. I'll think about those changes. I used true to give a bit od alliteration . Might be a mistake in a minimalist poem like this. Thanks for coming by and dropping off some suggestions. Now I'll get out my Aussie- Southern dictionary and see if I can interpret them lmao..............stan
Oh, I should warn you,
that dictionary has been suppressed by the CIA to prevent an outbreak of open warfare between Australia and South Carolina.
hi
Who was it said "Americans and British are two people separated by a common language"? I guess the same hold true for Australians lol...........stan
Hi Lonnie
Thank you Lonnie. With a bit of luck maybe we'll make it to 39 lol...............stan