"WHEN I AM ASKED" Imagery shop poem stripped

When I am asked
how I began writing poems,
I talk about the indifference of nature.

It was soon after my mother died,
a brilliant June day,
everything blooming.

I sat on a gray stone bench
in a lovingly planted garden,
but the day lilies were as deaf
as the ears of drunken sleepers
and the roses curved inward.
Nothing was black of broken
and not a leaf fell
and the sun blared endless commercials
for summer holidays.

I sat on a gray stone bench
ringed with the ingénue faces
of pink and white impatiens
and placed my grief
in the mouth of language,
the only thing that would grieve with me.

from Alive Together by Lisel Mueller
Stripped version

When asked
how I began writing poems
I talk about nature

I sat on a bench
in a garden
but the lilies were deaf
as the ears of sleepers
the roses curved inward
nothing was damaged
not one leaf fell
and the sun blared commercials
for summer

I sat on a bench
ringed with faces
of impatiens
and put my grief
in the mouth of language
which alone would grieve with me
*commentary should concern the differences between the original and stripped version......stan

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