Geezer
Geezer
Jul 22, 2022

Voyage of The Rum Runner... Chapter II

The storm roared
as a living thing
throughout the night
only to whimper away
at the appearance
of the brash sun.
The flotsam of our brave ship
spread upon the shore
gave the only proof
of her demise.

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Direction: How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - polished draft

About the Author

Region, Country: New York State - USA, USA

Favorite Poets: Poe

This user supports Neopoet so it can be free to all

More from this author

Comments

Jackweb

"The storm roared
as a living thing
throughout the night
only to whimper away
at the appearance
of the brash sun."

The the usage of personification in the poem. It creates an image in the reader's mind in a more engaging way.

You're a poetic master!

Nice piece!
.

Geezer

Those are my favorite lines also. I thought of the sun being brash, because it appeared as though nothing had happened and was as hot and merciless as any other day. ~ Geez.
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S

you alway manage to get a lot into a few words

RoseBlack

Simple, short write with an excellent story. I look forward to reading more about this.

Geezer

having an unofficial round-robin. Just a little something to keep things fresh around here. I can make it an oficial kind of thing by compilng a list and having people going in turn, if there is enough interest. ~ Geez.
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RoseBlack

Perhaps a new activity here on Neo? I kind of like the informal challenges like we have been doing with colors as well!! I think it really brought out some of the best in all of us. We have lots of new members that are actively participating so they may be interested in some of these activities as well.

Geezer

on this new development. Glad to see that there is interest. Informal is good, but there will have to be a little structure. I think that a list to keep things from getting out of hand and order should be a prerequisite. Few rules, but at least a couple. Thanks for showing interest. ~ Geez.
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Candlewitch

your continuation is mighty fine! I cannot choose favorite lines or break apart something that stands on it's own two feet. nice work!

*hugs, Cat

Geezer

indicated to RoseBlack, I like the idea well enough to make it an official kind of thing, if there seems to be enough interest.
I will think upon the whole idea and come up with a proposal. Thanks for getting this started. ~ Geez.
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