Hiding emotions in metaphors

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Trapped In Space (For Metaphor Workshop)

How did I get here,
floating like a balloon?

Gasping,
I reached out
but there was nothing
I stared
at the vast realm
of space,
surrounded by
clustered stars
planets and galaxies,
near and far.

Each of them making me feel
like a tiny speck of dust
as I wandered aimlessly.
There is no up or down,
not a single sound.
I called out for help
but there is no reply
so I cried like a child,
gripped by panic and fear.

''Wake up!'' a familiar voice snapped
and the infinity of space disappeared
as I found my sleepy sister by my side,
shaking me like a crazed woman.
Thus end the most terrifying nightmare,
I have ever had.

About This Poem

Style/Type: Free verse

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - draft

About the Author

Region, Country: singapore, SGP

Favorite Poets: Emily Dickinson

Comments

I think I have covered

1) The feeling of helplessness, panic, fear
2) Some decriptiions of space, its emptiness (nothing to hold on) and yet in the emptiness, there are 'things' (planets, stars)

Alid

Interesting nightmare

Interesting nightmare narrated pretty well Alid

raj

thank you very much.

Alid

Thank you Khalid

and thanks again for the self assessment.
Though this is supposed to be a nightmare, it put a smile on my face while reading. I liked the twist that came at the end as it wasn't expected. It could have been more terrifying if your sister hadn't woken you up. :)
I liked also the description. But the true challenge is coming, I guess. lol

Two nit picks, if I may:
I thought [clustered] would work better than "clustering"
disappear....[disappeared]
Thank you brother for sharing.