scribbler
Jun 17, 2011

THOUGHTS ON A ROCK

High on a Blue Ridge mountain side
with naught but skid trail for my guide
which must have been ,itself; quite old
as trees now stood there tall and bold

Matters not the time of year
but, in fact, winter was drawing near
with most leaves reclined upon the ground
where wind lent them a rustling sound

Then a stone of middling size
caught my gaze to my surprise
there among the leaves and duff
it, at first, looked bland and plain enough

I bent and picked it up to see
just what type that it might be
it wasn't quartz, not near that white
but, still and all, it was quite bright

I guess a frost had cleaved it clean
allowing composition to be seen
it was a sediment formed type rock
what it revealed was a mild shock

For fossil sea shells dwelt within
most were tiny, frail and thin
compact and set within hard sands
here in this oldest of high lands

I looked around and closed my eyes
and let my imagination rise
a million years, perhaps much more
since this was an ocean's salty shore

Then laying, not throwing, stone back down
a smile replaced my thoughtful frown
if this mountain top was once a sea
how unimportant I must be

About This Poem

Style/Type: Structured: Western

Review Request Direction: What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?

Review Request Intensity: I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Editing Stage: Editing - rough draft

About the Author

Region, Country: South Carolina, United States, USA

Favorite Poets: Frost

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Comments

S

Even an old dog can eventually learn lol. Thanks for visiting and eagle eye............stan

Hooded Stranger

Hooded Stranger

13 years 10 months ago

Stan,

this one drifts gently along, no fast pace, just slowly.

I wondered where you were going to take this piece and am pleased with the final stanza...we are nothing in the might of this world and nature.

I liked the rhyme, again simple but easy on the eye and voice, and liked the way you used the commas to really slow down the tempo when need be.

Some may read this and just say its a nice little rhyme, but you've thought about this one and controlled the reader with the style of write.

Nice job my friend...even if it is another nature one!!

HS

S

scribbler

13 years 10 months ago

In reply to by Hooded Stranger

BEWARE lest the scribbler take control (with evil laughter) lol. Thank you for such kind comment...........stan

S

I must write more epics than I realized then lol. Although it probably take an effort of epic proportions to get through most of them lol........................stan

loved

Eddie,
You have given the lead
And
I'm grateful to uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
Others may follow suit
Let’s get out of the graves,
Of our ancestors
And
Compose each poem afresh,
Unique and out of the blue
AND
WE ALL ARE SURE
ALL WILL LOVE
THIS NEW TREND TOO …

LET’S MAKE A BEGINNING
AS change is the womb
Of a newer generation
How I wish all of us knew...

Eduardo Cruz

I love when you write of nature, you just do it so well, you are one of the most Taoist person I have met. what's funny is you don't realize you are, and that's where your simplicity lies.
great, great job to look back through time at the earth's start.
Western classic is your forte.

Bravo my friend,
Eddie

S

Maybe there is an advantage to being a simpleton lol...................................stan PS now I'm gonna have to look up Taoist

S

You know, not every body or every poem has to be about delving into the vast unknown within our souls. Have you not the capacity to wonder about the mundane hints of the past which have been left behind? If not, I pity you for it would mean your consciousness would be on the same level as the shell's........................stan PS but thanks for the time to read and comment

S

If all art were restricted to subjects which have the capacity for abstract thought, we would sure get tired of pictures and poems of nothing but people. If I am missing your point perhaps you are not being clear on what your point is............stan